A
female
age
36-40,
*nhappyand scared
writes:Hi people well recently i have been applying for live-in hospitality jobs.I enjoy this type of work and im good at many different things.However the past 6yrs of my life have been robbed from me ss i was in a violent relationship and pretty messed up and he died in january.So i am here on my own free to do whatever i want. I live with my mum we get in well but i just do nt feel im going to go anywhere if i continue living there. Thing is when an opportunity arises i just feel scared infact TERRIFIED! I need to overcome this and break out of my comfort zone. Anyone else struggled with this? Would appreciate some advice ;-)
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female
reader, unhappyand scared +, writes (10 September 2014):
unhappyand scared is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthankyou i did go and it wasnt for me but the great thing is i tried it.
I have since found a simialr job near home and i am enjoying it.
However there is still issues i need to deal with and i think counselling is the way to go.
Thankyou everyone for your words of hope and for answering me in my time of need.
A
female
reader, NORA B  +, writes (19 June 2014):
Well done u re ur new job enjoy it and just take things in a slow fashion.I HOPE you will consider going to a counsellor .Im delighted that you also thought of going yourself.Best of luck with your job and your future.TIME will sort things out .Kind regards NORA B.
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A
female
reader, unhappyand scared +, writes (18 June 2014):
unhappyand scared is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi many thanks for your replies.
I am leaving tomorrow to go and have a months trial at a hotel in surrey.
I am excited and nervous which i guess is to be expected.
Im a terrible one for ruminating on things and getting really anxious.
Im hoping that if i just try things my confidance will grow.
I have thought about counselling before but never really gone through wth it.
I guess im worried abt being on my own and hurting my family by not being here.
Ive made my decision now though and i have to give it a go because i will always wonder.
Thankyou for your kind words and encouragement i really appreciate it ;-)
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A
female
reader, malvern + ♥, writes (17 June 2014):
 When you say you are terrified, what are you exactly terrified of? You seem to have gone through a very bad time and now those bad times are behind you. The way forward can only be an improvement. You say you get on well with your mother and I am sure she will support you in whatever you decide to do with your life.
You need to tell yourself that now is the start of the rest of your life, the past is the past and now it's time to move on. Don't be afraid, the vast majority of people are not like your late partner and if you get out there in the world again I'm sure you will meet friendly and helpful people.
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A
female
reader, NORA B +, writes (17 June 2014):
I am so sorry to hear of your past 6 years in a violent relationship.However that is in the PAST.Also death is always a shock and we are inclined to think of the good times rather than the bad ones. Now you have 2 situations to deal with here .{1] You have to heal from the hurt of the past and try and be gentle with yourself .On this issue would you consider going to a counsellor this would be of great to you and help you to heal.[2] Also you now have his death to deal with and at the best of times this is very dificult to deal with. So again the COUNSELLOR could be of help to you.It will take Time to deal with this but Time is a great HEALER.Kind Wishes NORA B.
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