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anonymous
writes: i dont know where to start with my problem i was abused by my partner six weeks ago and the police were called. i havent seen my ex partner since that day and dont intend to again the problem is i was scared to be on my own and moved out to a male friends house for a few days so my ex could not find me. i only see my friend as just that a mate, but now it seems like he wants more from our relationship. he contacts me all the time comes round all the time and im feeling very smoothered. part of me knows that its only concern for me but he wants to keep cuddling me and keeps trying to kiss me which i dont want. i have talked to him about this and he says he knows i only want friendship and support so why does he keep asking me to do these things when he can see that i dont want him in that way. the other week i met someone that i thought could be a friend aswell and arranged to meet for a drink in a busy pub so that there would be other people around that i knew if things didnt go well i told my friend about this date and he demanded that i didnt go to meet him then when i said i was going went moody and told me not to have sex with this guy which was never my intention anyway. i dont want to loose him as a mate as he is fun to be around when he doesnt act like a control freak and i can talk to him about how im feeling. i dont want any man in my life for the foreseeable future as my self esteem is rock bottom and i need to get my head sorted after what my ex did to me and i still have a court case against my ex looming and so all my energies need to be put towards that not to anything else. how do i stop my friend becoming my worst nightmare and just be my friend
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moved out, my ex, self esteem Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 October 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni would like to thank all the people involved especally those that have gone that extra mile for me phil and his lovely g/f i do appreciate those things and all the tears ive shed they aint come to nothing and i will fight back thats a promise i just want to add if there are any people out there to be unlucky enough to be abused you can always ask me for help and i will do what i can to help no one needs this endless cycle im here to help and listen ok wishing you the best
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female
reader, elliebellie  +, writes (28 October 2007):
you have just escaped from a man who abused you. i think you would feel safer with a group of girls. they might be easier to discuss your feeling with. at the moment you just need to care and friendly love and i dont think this guy realises that. hope this helps
lol
ellie
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female
reader, JaffaZ  +, writes (28 October 2007):
 Wow, your friend really seems to have a thing for you! I agree with Waterloo Sunset, you should see if you can stay with a female friend. At least until things cool off a bit. Try to distance yourself from your controlling friend a bit so he won't be tempted to try something with you. Or if your not too worried you might hurt his feelings, try telling him that what he's doing is really annoying you, and that you're angry with him. That should knock him down a bit.
Best of luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 October 2007): Do you not have any girlie friends who you can go and stay with. I this this male friend has other things in mind. He shouldnt be trying to kiss and cuddle you. Let him know that you are very grateful for his friendship but that is as far as it goes or he may think he is going to get more from you. Dont be made to feel uncomfortable also. You are free to meet just who you want and when you want and point this out to him. It is not up to him either if you have sex with them. Put him in the picture. BUT i would move again if you can and try and stay with a girl friend, not male. Sometimes the temptation becomes too much and you are a very vunerable person right now and i think your male friend knows this 100% and is acting on it.
take care
xx
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