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age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I've always done my own thing in life- marched to the beat of my own drum so to speak. I just feel like the odd one out at times because I have different interests than people my age. I never liked to go to parties or clubs- it’s too crowded, I can’t hear anything, and don’t like to drink/smoke. I’m pretty quiet and reserved. Around my friends and family I’m a little more outgoing though. I don’t like “bad boys.” I don’t have the time or patience to put up with them. I am interested in foreign affairs. I enjoy reading and traveling. I just feel like I’m different or odd compared to my friends or other people my age. I still get nervous and am not totally confident in myself. I don’t want to follow others and do the same things they are doing, but sometimes it gets lonely being the “outsider” so to speak. I mean I’m in my mid 20’s and I still feel like the same quiet, shy dorky kid I was in high school. I don’t want to be something I’m not and start acting wild. (ie: partying, sleeping around, etc.) I just don’t know where I belong or fit in anymore.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2009): Hey - you are who you are and it sounds as though you are a sensible person & there's nothing wrong with that. A lot of people do stuff, especially yonger people, to fit in etc .. I was the same as you when I was younger (I'm 43 now) and my daughter, who is 18, is the same, whereas my older daughter is more of a party animal but still sensible. We are all different and there are loads of activities etc out there to cater for all tastes. I find that just focusing on my family, health, career, own interests etc is the best way to be and following my instincts. I do socialise with friends but I try to meet like minded people & I have my own mind. We don't have to 'fit in' or be 'placed' into a category or mold - it's nice to be individual and as for 'bad boys' oh just stay well away - some girls think they're exciting but in the long term all they spell is trouble and real heartache. It seems like you have a good group of close friends and family and there are loads of people like you, of all ages, who love reading and travelling. I've never been into clubs or drinking and still aren't - I too like books and travelling and spending time with family and close friends and that is absolutely fine. It sounds like you have an interesting life. When I was in my early 30's I felt a bit uncertain but now I am confident in who I am and quite self aware re my negative and positive areas and you will be the same! Carrying on enjoying who you are. Stay away from the bad boys......I had a couple of those years ago and it was just terrible - never ever again! :) x
A
female
reader, bootyboot  +, writes (30 December 2009):
You sound like me, so hooray for you! Instead of focusing on the negative aspect of being different, appreciate the fact that you are perhaps more enlightened than the average person. You have a good head on your shoulders, you're smart, curious, introspective and sensitive...and that's just fine!!
Trust me, I was an awkward outsider as a teen and into my early 20's. I felt the same way as you. I've always did my own thing, but part of me wanted to be accepted and liked. After college I moved to new york city and finally found my niche. If you want interesting and unique people, that is the place to go. After I came out of my comfort zone and made a group of cool friends, I started gaining more confidence. As a teen, I didn't care much for myself, but now I'm so grateful that I stayed true to myself and developed a unique identity.
You just need to find other people like you, and then you'll realize you are special afterall. Embrace your eccentricities, I promise you'll find others who think like you!
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A
male
reader, DeadEyeDick +, writes (30 December 2009):
 You and I share a lot of the same qualities as well, I am kind of odd, as in, I am very interested in local and world affiars, am well read, if somethings on tv i want to watch(witch doesnt occur that often) I stay home and watch, I go to bars, but I dont drink so it's really more for socializing, but I can have fun doing about anything, but all in all, when Ive had enough ive had enough, then I need alone time, my ex couldnt deal with that, becasue she always wanted to go do something, and would get mad that I would rather read, then watch tv, everybodys different!just be who you are, and eventually(I hope) well meet someone like us!
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A
female
reader, Pip24d +, writes (30 December 2009):
My advice to u is to take some time to realise your true self and connect and embrace it. Find other things to do and expand your friend base. Find a hobby u love and do it. Just connect with your true self and learn to love it and remembre that its your life, you have the power, and you can maje yourself happy no one else
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A
male
reader, AgonyUncleDan  +, writes (30 December 2009):
 You are alot like me in some respects. I'm not really the one to go out partying either. But you have to remember you are your own person. High school was a lot different to now, You have changed in so many ways and one day you will find someone who loves you for you, you will find your soul mate. As for trying to make friends Try places a little less "busy" to socialize, go out with some friends for a drink and ask the to bring their friends and so on. I can't really say more than that :-)
-AgonyUncleDan!
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2009): Hey, i think you should never change you for no one, i am a jamaican and in my family i have three sisters and 1 brother, i hasd the darkest skin so i was made fun of and was teased, i was usually quiet which meant i was always thinking about my actions, behavior and stuff. when i turned 20 i lived to hear my bigger sister who was 25 at the time saying she wished she was more like me, now i never changed me, anywhere i go i satnd out casue i am different from all the rest, there is always someone who will appreciate you for you, that person or persons may not be in the same state or country, but they are out there
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