A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:Hello, I was just wondering if I could have some of your opinions. I am 22 years old and have been with my boyfriend since I was 18. He is 27, we met when he was 24. He had fallen in love with me right away, and after time, I fell in love back. We have been living together for the past year and we plan on getting married soon( I know the proposal is coming). Anyway, he is financially sucessful, very caring and I know he just wants to make me happy. I know I would be happy for the rest of my life but one thing is stopping me. I am not sure if it is a big deal or not, but he was my first "partner". He has been with 5 or 6 girls before me. I know what most of his exs were like and what they look like- but the more he talks about them or the more I find out, it bugs me. It bothers me that he has a "past" and I don't. I know I cant go back in time and change anything but I also do not want to regret not being with other people 10 years later. I can't help but obsess over his past...do I just need to get over it?PSHe also still talks to some of them which drives me absolutely insane. I don't like it all and he gets mad at me if I ask him to not answer/delete their numbers from his phone. Would it be too much to ask if I told him that once we get married the chit chat between them should stop?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2006): 1. Dont be paranoid if you love him dont worry about his past and let it come natural. He obviously likes you loads (understatement) would he pick you if he cared about being inexperienced? Doubts and lack of trust will destroy your relationship and marriage. This rate i would be suprised if you lasted 6 months as man and wife, a year if you are lucky.
2. Simple, dont marry him until he stops contact, its simple respect and even i am paranoid the way you wrote that makes it appear something more is going on (i didnt say affair) but it seems he is more cosy with them then he is with you, so why is he amrrying you if he gets on better with someone else?
3. Maybe you are being too over enthusiastic with that he may propose to you. it sounds like he is messing you about and ask anyone they say the key factor of what a relationship requires is TRUST and you dont trust him.
So on that bombshell i dont necessary say get rid of him, i just say its far too early for you two to get married, there are alot of issues to be ironed out before hand before you even consider it.
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