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I love and care for my boyfriend but I don't see us marrying and I often have crushes on other guys!

Tagged as: Faded love, Three is a crowd<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 October 2008) 1 Answers - (Newest, 9 October 2008)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

I think I have a serious problem and I want to know honest opinions on what I should do. My boyfriend and I have been in a relationship for 4 years now (I'm in my 20's) and I love and care for him very much (I don't believe I'm in love with him anymore for a number of reasons) he's such a sweet guy and he treats me right but I can't see us making serious commitments such as marriage, children, etc. Now, another part of me is infatuated with a guy I knew back in middle school and who I recently found online.

We recently caught up with each other and he seems so interesting, we seem to have so much in common and I find him very attractive. I know he's attracted to me and I wanted us to keep in touch as friends but as soon as I told him I had a boyfriend, he's been keeping his distance. I understand this is probably his way of respecting my relationship (which makes my infatuation for him more intense).

I know this isn't right but now I wish I never told him about my boyfriend. My friends are telling me I have this whole "grass is greener" complex because this isn't the first time I've felt this way about someone else while in a relationship. I think the worst part is, I barely know this guy and the person he is now yet in my mind I picture him to be this perfect person, using just what I know from his MySpace page!

View related questions: crush, myspace

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2008):

i know what you mean. ive been with my girlfriend for a little over 3 years and i feel the exact same way...seein other people talkin with them wishing i was with them instead...but afraid of what would happen if i acually go through with that and i might just end up with nothing. my advice and what i think im ganna do is tell my girlfriend exactly how im feeling. for one its only fair to her. and 2 it might help with your decisions. for all you know he is in the same situation and mabey you guys can come up with a solution to put the spark back into it. but it dose help a little bit at least it did for me knowing that im not the only person in this situation. so good luck to ya and remember no regrets cuz at one point its exactly what ya wanted :)

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