A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I really like this guy at my school. We have been out twice already and it didnt really work out too well. Anyways we were on a video call last night over MSN and he kept saying stuff like your so pretty and sexy. The only problem is my ex bestmate. We really hate eachother. And ino her and her followers would play any trick too hurt me. Like getting him too ask me out then hurt me BIG TIME. Yes, she is that low. So what do i do if he does ask me out? I cant say its bcos of her cos she will find out and end up gettin a gang on me. And please dont say tell an adult or teacher. Cos teachers really dont care. Its more a slap on the hand and dont do it again kinda thing.
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2007): Girls your age can be extremely mean and spiteful, can''t they. I am sorry you are being bullied and harrassed. No one shou;ld live that way...constant fear. Firstly, this boy isn't the only boy in the world. If this boy asks you out, then keep your emotional attachments to him detached and don't allow yourself to get so close that you get hurt. This is the smart way to date anyways. You don't just hand over your heart and soul to the first boy who tells you 'you are pretty and sexy'. You ease into boy/girl relationships by befriending someone first and going slooowly. It keeps one more balanced. You will never know if he's a deceptive young man and in cahoots with this gang of girls who don't like you, unless you at least try. But, if you are unsure or you think he may not be trustworthy..then just don't date him. Perhaps you should think about dating boys that you know for certain are not connected to this young female who is harassing you. As for your parents...they do need to know what is going on. They can help by taking steps to getting this girl off your back. It's either doing that or tolerating this bullying and abuse for some years ahead of you. And we all know that bullying is wrong and is a form of horrid abuse. Stop the harrassment by taking a stand...get you parents to help you with ...today. Good luck,
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 September 2007): Ok well i guess this is something you want to handle yourself, which is fair enough. I would say first to try and stay as away from your ex bestfriend as possible as she is obviously trouble. I know its hard to, especially as shes probably in your class or in your face all the time, but if you learn to ignore it completely you will already feel better.
Now about this guy...Perhaps you should share your worries about your ex best mate to him and see what he says. Is he friends with her?If he isnt then telling him or warning him about her will probably keep him away, yet he might be that type of guy to join in practical jokes, so you have to see and wonder whether hes more likely to be on your side or hers. You can find this out sometimes by seeing who he hangs out with,whether they are trouble makers or not. You say you are worried she finds out and "gets a gang on me". If you truly mean a proper gang then im afraid you will have to speak to an adult, as this is serious. How about an older sibling you have(brother,sister)or a cousin? Perhaps someone not involved directly but that can help in some way?If she really is threatning physically then telling soemone could help.
If you find that the guy is immature and would do jokes that hurt you as your ex best mate would, then im afraid its time to give both of them up. You can find another guy that will protect you and be on your side, and you will feel much better!
Good luck, hope everything works out xxx
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