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male
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anonymous
writes: For the past year and a half I have been through a lot of mental torture as I like to call it. But the thing is it is for no apparant reason or at least I think it isn't.In 2005 I left school and went to college, shortly after that I got a job and after that met my girlfriend who I am still with and happy with. I did all this in a month and for an anxious person like myself who has suffered with nervs in the past It was quite a lot. A few months after I was hit with a really sad mood which I could not explain, I was crying constantly and I don't cry usually so it was very strange. Over a week passed and I got better but I still suffered with anxieties and loss of interest. My girlfriend was worried I was going off her which didn't help. After 6 months I slowly got better and put it down to a minor case of depression but had no clue where it came from. After a year I had got better and was a lot happier but every so often I feel slightly depressed over small things such as how quick time is going and lack in motivation for life. I think about my safety and other peoples safety a lot and think situations through and what might happen and worry about death of loved ones.I really don't know why in the past 2 year which should be the happiest as I have a great girlfriend have been quite low in places. However it also has been great! What is wrong with me?Any thoughts will be much appreciated...
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female
reader, samohir  +, writes (11 September 2007):
 yea, Im still looking that damn pill to ease my will!!
If You got to any helpful solution please be nice to share it!
Thats it
A
female
reader, rawkstar_247  +, writes (11 September 2007):
 Nothing is wrong with you! :)
I myself have struggled with anxiety issues and what was diagnosed as bipolar disorder when I was a young teenager. At the time when I was diagnosed as bipolar, I went through the exact same thing. No matter how well my life was going, I still felt like complete and total shit. Worse than that, even! I'd attend some of my classes and see people occasionally, but would spend most of my time crying in my bed (which was really bizarre because I'm normally a very social person).
I tried all kinds of medications and nothing seemed to work. Some made my behave in an almost zombie-like fashion. Some made me gain weight, some made me lose sleep, some made me sleep all the time. Everyday felt like the worst day of my life, but somehow, the next day was even worse. I could never understand it, and my friends and family were very concerned and telling me to just "snap out of it" or "think more positively". People that have never suffered any kind of severe depression are the worst people for advice ever. They think its something we choose. They think its a conscious decision for depressed people to sit around and hate their lives. So untrue.
I don't know what "helped" me, persay. I started seeing someone for my anxiety. Actually, the work-book we went through was "The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook" by Edmund J. Bourne. At first a lot of the ideas in it seemed a little lame, but once I actually put in the effort, I saw results. Dealing with the anxiety helped with the depression, which really made me realize what a viscious, interconnected chain it all truly is. Part of the reason I was bummed out in the first place was because I was so anxious all the time and felt ridiculous. It caused me to have low self-esteem, and that itself sprouts all kinds of new problems.
Also, as is covered in the aforementioned book, I started exercising. I know, it sounds like such a simple thing that you wouldn't think it would make much difference, but it does. The days when you don't even want to get out of bed, its really hard. But once you're finished, you really do feel a lot more centered and a lot better.
So, I'm not really sure if that helps. My best adivce would be if you do see a doctor, research whatever drugs they prescribe you before taking them. Also, remember that even if prescription medication helps you, there still may be underlying issues that you need to deal with in a counsellor-type setting, when you're ready of course. A lot of times, people get on these pills and use them as an excuse to keep pushing the root of their problems underneath the rug so they never have to deal with them.
All the best to you! I hope you have some luck with the suggestions I made, and if not, I hope someone else gives you a suggestion that works for you!
Hang in there.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2007): Oh sweetheart. I feel for you. I wish we could both give each other hugs. I have suffered with depression forever too. I am probably depressed right now. I don't even know anymore. I am sorry. I know about the anxiety and fears of death and fear of others dying. IT SUCKS. And I don't know how to stop it. And the lack of motivation. Do you know I am in my sixth year of college because of this??? Thank god I am graduating this year finally. And I am so scared to. What I am I going to do?? I see a wrinkle on my face and I panic. Sometimes I panic when the phone rings. Scared it's bad news (and I KNOW you know what I am talking about!)
Your problem is your fear. My problem is my fear. It is 'generalized anxiety disorder.' That will make anyone depressed. You start dwelling and dwelling on your fears till it consumes you. God I am so happy you wrote this. There are others like me! You know what the thing is?? I have been to so many therapists and they all suck. Never helped me. My last therapist started taking her phone messages in the middle of my session. In the middle of my sentence! In any case, I never really spoke honestly with her. With anybody. I have a hard time acknowledging that I have a problem.
Well your best bet is to get some treatment. You do have many treatment options. Get yourself to a psichiatrist and tell him EXACTLY what you are going through. He'll get you on meds right away. Antidepressants really do work for a lot of people. And maybe if you go to a therapist you can start taking group therapy (I know this sounds horrible but it is recommended) and work through your dilemma. My last, last therapist told me that having a broken heart (aka depression) is like having a broken foot. You need to get it healed and fixed. That is what professionals will do for you. So don't put this off any longer. Go get help just like if you needed to go to the doctor. Ok? No ones going to judge you and the bright side of it is that you might actually be lucky enough to put this all behind you. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2007): i personally think you may be suffering from depression, which so many people suffer fron these days so believe me you are not on your own. please go and see your doctor and tell them exactly how you feel. dont be at all embarrassed, you would go to your doctor if you had a bad leg etc... this is the same only it is your mind that is hurting sometimes. please go, take care and all the best x
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