A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My name is Tameika, and my question is how can i trust my mate if i have trust issues? He has been seeking to be with other people due to me not being able to trust him. I have been hurt before and i am scared to trust my mate because i think he will hurt me the same way. Can you give me some kind of advice. Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2008): We all have fears. The critical thing to recognize, is that we may react out of fear, and in a way that we send someone in the direction that causes them to act and fulfill our worse fears; they break our trust. What we don't recognize, is that we caused it.
As a suggestion for consideration, would be to first find out what the fear is, which is trust. What trust issues are you concerned with? Not getting something you feel you need to make you whole or protected?
Once you have search and found the answer of your true needs, then you should discuss these with him. Make sure you have his full attention, if not, it will make you mad and bring up another trust issue. If you have to write it, and then read it to him, okay, if this will make it very clear and to the point without placing him in a defensive mode. Then give him time to think about it, and then together, discuss it again and if need be, work out a compromise.
|
