A
female
age
30-35,
*ndee15
writes:i visited the guy that i really like and we got along great, had lots of laughs etc. when i returned home, we texted and everything was fine.i got on twitter and started tweeting about my guy friend that passed away and then I tweeted "random I love you's make my heart melt" and the guy i'm talking to now sends me random pictures sometimes of him holding up the "I love you sign"..2 days ago the text seemed a bit short and distant and i texted him first yesterday,i asked him about his day, he took hours to respond *which normally that doesn't happen* and then he said that he was frustrated and i asked why...i haven't received a text. I checked twitter and a recent tweet read "aww man i love my" i don't know who my is or if he didn't complete the sentence but i feel like such a fool, and i get so panicky when a guy i like doesn't respond to me right away. should i just forget about him and move on? i feel like an idiot. I feel like crying everyday I don't see a txt from him (sounds crazy I know) but this is really hurting me.
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2013): It's not a question of getting over it yourself... Ok he's texted back this time but what if this happens again... Which it will, as it's part of life.Depression/ anxiety is often down to brain chemistry- once that destructive impulse kicks in, no matter how much CBT/ rationalising you try and apply to the situation it becomes a despair you can't control or escape- as I'm sure you well know. It's too hard to face on your own- and you can't . Please go to the doctors, write everything down from the smallest detail about anxiety/ depression and he'll (if he's any good) prescribe you anti depressants, which take the edge off and put you in the right frame of mind to get counselling and work towards helping yourself. You need to get to the root of this anxiety, whether it's purely physiological or due to deep- seated childhhood events. - you can't do it on your own, you need professional help- and this includes medication I.e antidepressants. Xx
A
female
reader, indee15 +, writes (21 June 2013):
indee15 is verified as being by the original poster of the question actually, i do get nervous and shaky, have high anxiety/depression and even stop eating meals at times especially after losing someone to death or in a breakup, i really have to stop that and get over things quicker. thanks for your response and he has texted me back ! :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2013): HiJust a question- do you often get like this because of stuff like this I.e nervous talking to guys, panicky, depressed over people you barely know? I used to be like this for years, it really held me back in life, not even that long ago, a similar thing happened to me- he didn't text back- Over the space of about 5 days, I literally ate about three meals, was shaky, sweating, a. Nervous wreck, crying I didn't leave my room and worse but Ill say no more ! You may not be at this extreme but tbh from experience, getting this worked up about a text, I mean he's 99.9% not your soul mate- and you don't know him that well, if this is your normal reaction to stuff like this, maybe you're a bit predisposed to depression/ anxiety? If this is the first time maybe you're just a bit taken with him and it's a one off or whatever! But listen , you're over-thinking things, stop thinking about what the worst could be, you'll never know the complete picture- and what can we do about the ways of the world anyway? Lol. Don't dwell; it solves nothing and you gain nothing from it. Post an update :) xx
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A
female
reader, indee15 +, writes (19 June 2013):
indee15 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThankyou, even though he has yet to respond, I do feel a bit better with your response... i'll give it time and see where it goes. I really like him, and i'm just going to guess that he's having issues with his phone or something. I hope he responds to me soon.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (19 June 2013):
 Some people are just not cut out for long distance relationships.
in the olden days (say 1978-1981) when I was your age
we did not have cell phones or the World Wide Web to keep up with folks.
if a boy wanted to talk to me he had to call my house phone
a letter took days to arrive... there was no instant gratification and contact was not constant.
I understand how you feel my husband and I did LDR for a year before he moved here to be with me and on days he was not in touch regularly (phone and email) I felt a bit lost sometimes. In the beginning there were times we were out of contact for 10 days at a time. I had to bite my tongue and let it go. I could not pester him for attention. It was hard but I managed. Once we got serious, I was able to explain to him why I needed daily contact and we worked that out.
So you have met him once and then gone home... after a nice time.... it's way to early in the relationship to be this upset if you don't hear from him.
I think the song that says it best is "you can't hurry love you just have to wait" and in this case that sounds like what's going on here. you can't force it...
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