A
male
age
30-35,
*alinew
writes:Well here's what's going on now. My girlfreind recently borke up with me and it hurts very much. however, i feel that she is not done with me, and i know i'm not done loving her. The thing is that she has been abused her whole life, by family freinds and ex-boyfreinds. She told me directly that i'm the only one that has truley cared for her and never have taken advantage of her.One of her closest freinds is also mine and I've been talking to her a lot because she is alos my brother's girlfreind. What she's said to me is that my ex doesn't know what a real realationship is. I agree with her, i don't know whetehr this is good or bad. i've decided to give my ex some time but i don't know if she is going to go with someone else.i know that i must give her time but i'm asking if i should talk to her or not at all or just let her go and wait for her to talk to me.
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male
reader, ShouldKnowBetter  +, writes (23 March 2008):
The basis of any good relationship is friendship and its key elements (respect, trust, communication). As such, if you want the relationship to continue in the future then you should remain her best friend but not to over crowd her or put pressure on her for the elements that take things from friendship into lover.You also need to look at to why she broke off the relationship. Is she simply not ready for commitment due to her past or were you possibly showing traits which she saw in her previous relationships?
A
female
reader, tsurugi-ijin +, writes (23 March 2008):
 Send her a reasuring email, just saying that if she ever needs some one to talk to your always there for her, you dont mind if she doesnt want more than just friends you just want to make sure shes ok ect.She probably just needs time to get her head straight and to think and probably does still like you if your hearing this off friends as well.i doubt that after finding you that she says she trusts so much that she will just fall into the arms of someone else, if she does it would only be trying to find a replacement for some one that she loved.All the best, Jin
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A
male
reader, lovinit +, writes (23 March 2008):
this opinion is coming from an 18 yr old with a bachelors degree and is currently in medical school to become a cardiac surgeon.. :) so here we go!
off topic: got a week off of medical school and helping people with their lives at 4:34am est! lovin it! ( no sarcasm)
yeah, i suppose she needs time but i never understood how a female needs to take a 'break' with a male thats treats are with full respect that she deserves.
sounds like you care for her. let her know about this. go in great length to explain it to her :)
that should work. try that out and post back and let us know her response. if she didn't have one then its hopeless. i always found it such a shame when the people who actually care about you, you turn away while with the people who abuse you and don't respect you , you allow them to keep doing it. ill never get that... but oh well...
let me know if this has helped you. if you have any questions or comments you can always personal message me.i will be awaiting your reply :)
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