A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Hey everybody, thanks in advance for your opinionsso i guess i wondering what is going on with this guy i am seeing...so he 10 years older, and we met through a mutual friend, we met mid september we hung out every weekend he was home (he works out of town about once a month, until recently), even both friday and saturday night.we have slept with each other, and he took me out on a date, he paid and drove all the typical stuff. he has taken me out before but our mutual friend was there as well.we have already dealt with a fair amount of drama, an ex-gf of his saw of kissing and kinda flipped out, to say the least. anyways he was gone almost all of november for work, i guess a very busy month for him. so last time i saw him i was at my friends house, and we had gone out to lunch earlier in the day, and i brought his left overs to the friends house, since they live super close, he was on his way out to guys night, and he kissed me a few times and said he would see me later. so he gone the following week, and i tried to call him when i knew he was back, but i guess he just hunkered down in his house and didn't call back, maybe i should have left a message, and he left for another week, i txted him asking if he would like to go to a movie, he replied very enthusiastically yes.and said he would call me when he was back, so he come back after another 5 days, and has dinner with my friend, and while they were having dinner he asked her if i would be pissed since he is back in town and didn't call, but since he was only home for one night he didn't feel like he was back until the following friday (before thanksgiving. i dunno she told him i would be pissed and then after he explained more, she said i wouldn't.anyways i was dog sitting for her over thanksgiving.and i almost saw him twice(once at the grocery store, once on the stairwell), but felt too weird to say hello because he said he would call when he got back and didn't(also i am like 98% sure that he was unaware that i was there both times). i know he is the kinda guy that needs some time to be home first, but tuesday, like 5 days later, i sent him a txt msg daying i was dog sitting for my friend and would be there, all week. he replied the next day "whats up with yourself? got dog duty ehh...nice. so is all good which ya?"and an hour later after i got out of my managment class, i replied "yeah alls good" and i guess i am getting mixed reactions from my friends that maybe i should have said more then, or no since i intiated it the night before if he wanted to see me if would have said, still others are like he prolly felt a bit rejected, since you didn't suggest anything........and i feel like i need a manual to communicate with guys. i have no idea what to think,but i like him, and all parties that know us think i would be good for him,after the crazy shit girls have pulled on him, and he would be good for me, i just dunno though....
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male
reader, Fatherly Advice + ♥, writes (2 December 2008):
 Anonymous writes: "...and i feel like i need a manual to communicate with guys."I've been thinking that would make a good article.In the mean time you are dealing with a significant age gap and a Long Distance Relationship. In the lack of a users manual I would suggest consulting an expert. Either your friend or the man in question. Just be honest, say "I am getting crossed signals" "I need more input".Nothing ever turned me on as much as knowing someone was interested in me. I agree not to be too push about it.I'm 10 years older than him, so this may not apply, but texting just doesn't do it for me. Best of luck and keep us posted.FA
A
female
reader, Teacake +, writes (1 December 2008):
 Don't call or text him anymore! That is the biggest mistake women make! Let them chase us and I can tell you by all the men I know, if they are interested in a woman, they do what they can to get her. Men really don't like women doing the chasing. So stop! Try to relax. Good luck!
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