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male
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anonymous
writes: I have a beautiful girlfriend I love to bits, but I keep getting strange sexual feelings that I don't think are normal.It happens when I masturbate and make love to her from behind. I keep thinking about another guy fucking her and her really enjoying it. I have an average/small willy and this guy is always bigger than me.I'm really getting off on the thought but after I've cum, the cold reality hits me and I don't like the thought.I also like to watch her play with herself, maybe cause I know at the back of her mind she's thinking of someone else's big cock.Help! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (23 October 2005):
 Don't worry; you're normal.
You love your girlfriend, and you want her to have the most incredibly-satisfying sex, right? So in your fantasy, she is. It's just not with you, because you believe that your todger isn't enough for her, so you imagine some guy with a much bigger tool getting her off.
After you finish the fantasy, your conscious mind comes to the fore again and says "Hey! No other guy should be having sex with my girl!" and you get those weird feelings.
It's fairly normal fantasy stuff, in the same way that most of use have fantasies that we'd never play out in real life because they'd be too kinky or bizarre or would just feel "wrong" if we really did them. It's OK to have fantasies; you don't have to act on them.
If you get off on the idea of your girlfriend having sex with a guy whose lap rocket is larger than yours, just accept that you're fantasising that your girlfriend is having the time of her life. It's only in your mind, after all. It didn't happen in reality and it's very unlikely to, because most women aren't all that concerned (not nearly as concerned as their partners, anyway) about the size of their man's willy.
Just use what you have well, and she'll be happy.
A
female
reader, xxxsoulsistaxxx  +, writes (22 October 2005):
 There's nothing wrong with fantasies, they're completely normal, however weird they may seem in the cold light of day. We often get carried away during sex, thinking thoughts we daren't think in normal day-to-day activities. But these aren't bad, provided they're not too sick, and if they work for you, that's fine.
Just enjoy sex and don't think too much about the in's and outs (not literally!) of it, it takes away the magic. Just have fun and go with the flow, fantasise about whatever makes you happy!
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