A
male
age
41-50,
*azanco
writes:Ladies,i broke-up with my GF, yesterday, i feel soooo guilty, but it weas her repetitive mistakes, that i used to warn her about, she repeated these mistakes more then 20 time, "mistakes such as not telling me what problems she is facing, keeping secrets from me,she is just conservative about her life" but it hurts me and i told her that you hurt me, she says sorry i wont do it again, but she does.I know that our love is stronger than that, so, the question is:I told her when i called her that you did this and that, you made me get bored of your doings, you never listened, but i am breaking up although i still love you, but you lost my trust, and i am sure no one will ever give you the love that i gave to you, the trust, the care, i wish that the next person whom you will call my love, is worth it, and i asked her for a final kiss.do you think she will come back to me!! :( Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2011): I almost did this exact thing...I said i was gonna break up with my bf many times because of similar reasons and then this weekend actually he turned round and said ok.He said clearly things arnt working and he doesnt give me what I need...truth was he did I was just incredibly selfish. Well I broke down crying and admitted my mistakes to him and he said ok but wasnt to keen on still being together but I was crying my heart out and he kept me but Im on thin ice so to speak with him.Lets just say I learned my lesson and I'll never do it again...so my suggestion is to talk to her, confession i dont know but be honest with her and she may decide to give you another chance...I was lucky enough and we are getting along amazing right now so I hope you do too =)
A
female
reader, DanceInTheDark  +, writes (24 March 2011):
 Look through everything you just said. Now tell me, why do you want her back?
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A
female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (24 March 2011):
 Oh boy. You fell into a big trap, my friend. Using a breakup (or a divorce/separation for that matter) is never ever a good tool for trying to get someone back. Think of it as a nuclear bomb to a relationship. You can't hope to restore or better a relationship by throwing a bomb on it to end it.Let's talk about why you broke up with her. Her mistakes to you are not talking about her problems, keeping secrets, and being conservative?? Unless she's cheating on you, they're her secrets to keep. They're her problems to have, and she has every right to be conservative with her life! It takes some people longer to get to know, and it's a long and careful process.You have to take time with people...let them trust you. Give her the time for that. Just enjoy being with her and don't try and force her to open up to you, because that can never happen. In fact, your breaking up with her closed her off even more because you're showing that you're not there for her.I say this again assuming that her secrets aren't about being with other guys. If she's cheating on you, then you don't want to be with her anyways.She's not going to crawl back to you. Breaking up with her can never be used to force someone to open up. You'll have to go back to her and apologize. Give her whatever time she needs to tell you about problems or whatnot. However, if you were unhappy, maybe you should stay broken up and find a woman who wears her heart on her sleeve, so to speak, and isn't so private about her life.
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A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (24 March 2011):
 If you wanted her back, you shouldn't have broken up with her.She shouldn't come back to you, and you shouldn't want her back. That's why you break up. Things weren't working. Let it go and move on, it will be the best move for you.
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