A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Ok... SO im 14, you all probably think im silly and dont no what real love is. But I went out with this lad, i hardly knew him when he asked me out, so first time i said no. He was at my school and in my year but I had never really spoke to him. Eventually after a few days I said yes. The time i spent wih him was amazing! But i just wasnt my self around him, and i just didnt no why. I was quiet, and wasnt my real self. So i did an awful thing... i dumped him through text! I asked my best friend what i should do becaus i was thinking of dumping him, and she advised me on the words! Then i egnored his calls, and now i regret it! Then i got to thinking, i didnt know him really well when i began to go out with him, so was i quiet beause i was scared he wouldnt like the real me? We dont talk much anymore, in fact we hardly talk.I just want to know, does he still like me, does he hate me? Is it my fault? I could go on forever about him, asking for advice, but i think ive said enough for now.If anyone can help and advise me?Thankyou From "Shy and Timid"
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2007): Hi there,
It sounds like this is going to be one of those things you're going to learn from. When you break-up with someone, in any way but especially by a cold and heartless text message you hurt that person and they become much more uncertain about having a relationship with you.
Saying you want to break up with someone should normally be a last resort and an end to a relationship as the person being dumped will have their confidence and security really hit.
This guy might still like you, but I imagine he probably has a mixture of anger and disappointment too.
The best thing you could ever do, if you want to fix this situation, is by being mature and grown up and speak to him in person, you and him alone. Tell him how sorry you are and that you were wrong to send him that text message, explain that people make mistakes. I'm not saying everything will be back to how they were, but he'll certainly appreciate it and I'm sure when you are a bit older you'll look back on this situation and be glad with yourself that you did what you could to put things right.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2007): Well, you sent him a clear message, what is he suppose to do ? If he liked you, he is probably hurt and embarrased. Why don't you call him and explain how you felt and why you did what you did. Maybe there is a chance that he will agree to be your friend again. Explain to him, that it's only since you put him off that you realised how much you do care for him and just apologise and see what happens. Good luck my dear.
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