A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Ok so I have a question. Hopefully someone can help. I'm a 24 yr old with a beautiful 3 yr old daughter. Lately I've been eager to have another child eventhough I know I'm definitely not ready. I'm living with my parents due to financial reasons. I'm with my dauhters father but we don't have a steady relationship. I don't trust him and we hardly get along. And I really don't know what to do about my career move. However I have a friend that's my age, that's pregnant with her 3rd child. The father of her kids are never around (except financially) and she's fine with that. I'm confused should I wait or should I go ahead. 50% does not want to have a child in my situation. The other 50% is telling me go ahead cause my daughters 3 going on 4 and she needs a sibling. My friend keeps telling me I need to have another one. But I'm confused?! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, love-him  +, writes (28 February 2008):
 HEY!!
The children will need love and care not only the financial area. Talk to your boyfriend and if he doesn't want another baby, respect his decisions..
GOOD LUCK!! Feel free to mail me at any time x x
A
female
reader, bc2283  +, writes (26 February 2008):
no one mentioned the father, is he cool with this? are you on birth control or are you gonna stop takin it and is he cool with that!
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A
male
reader, polarkite +, writes (25 February 2008):
 Bottom line: Your friend doesn't know what you need. Only you know what you need.This is what you've said:"Lately I've been eager to have another child even though I know I'm definitely not ready."Use your mind. There are powerful mom hormones at work which are probably telling you to have another child. Read a book. Get out of your parent's house. Find a better boyfriend. Raise your beautiful daughter.
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A
female
reader, jenna34 +, writes (25 February 2008):
I agree with what was said- your wants are more important than your baby's needs. Sad. You act like you are discussing getting a new puppy. You don't really want any advice, you just want that one person to say it's ok so you can do it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2008): This is ridiculous, your friends are telling you to have another child, a stranger is telling you to have a child so your daughter can have a sibling, you do not have a steady relationship with the father or any man for that matter and you live with your parents because you are unable or unwilling to support yourself......what gives you the right to bring a child into this scenario to pay for your mistakes? Nothing, sorry....your current child does not "need" a sibling....you do not "need" to have a child because your friends say so, you do not "need" to have a child because you don't feel ready but are confused....you are confusing "needs" with "wants".
Do yourself a favor and wait until you have a stable life, married, not living with your parents and financially independent, your kid will thank you and so will your unborn child.....sorry if that is not what you wanted to hear..but having a child bears the upmost responsibility and you do not "need" to burden society with a child you are unable to support and raise to a responsible adult.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (25 February 2008):
 If it is not a financial constraint to have another child, then I think having another child would be in the best interest of your daughter.She will have someone to play and grow up with.
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