A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend went to Ibiza in August/September which I had no problem with as I trust him. He came home and that's when all the pictures we're getting uploaded online by others he had met over there. The first few we're alright, of him and his friends being their usual silly selves, but as I went through them there we're some of a girl lay in between his legs around the pool to which I said to him 'it's not nice seeing pictures of some girl lay inbetween my boyfriends legs and he's sat there massaging her back' this angered me and then I seen more where it was him topless surrounded by girls. He said that there was nothing for me to worry about as he loves me only and only needs me. He has recently got the app 'snapchat' back and I noticed one of the girls he met in Ibiza is one of his 'best friends' on it. I know this is stupid and shouldn't get to me but it has and I don't know how to approach the situation. I do trust him, I just don't like the fact he's meeting girls abroad and messaging them. I know that if this was the other way around he wouldn't like it at all and would not react as calm as I have. Any help on what I should do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2014): Goodness if you seriously trust him with that evidence then good luck. What is your definition of cheating? If you clarify that to yourself then you can either forget all his actions or dump him. I know what I'd do.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2014): No, you don't get so close physically with another woman or man while you are in a relationship.
I can't imagine seeing my husband's pictures in such compromising position. One thing into just hug but another to spread your legs and let a girl sit there where your private parts are.,
That's unacceptable. You are not over exaggerating it. His behavor is innapropriate.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2014): What you have said would bother me too! You are not over reacting at all!He was waaaaay too cozy with these girls. Not proper behaviour for a guy who is in a committed relationship. Was he trying to take a vacation from his girlfriend as well? Pretend he was single again? A pic with girls around him in a group standing there smiling is one thing. But a girl in between his LEGS AND him massaging her back? He has stepped over the line and BIG TIME.AND... keeping in touch after the vacation is over? Not appropriate and not acceptable. I would be very mad at that.In fact, I would be MAD about everything he did!Tell him to unfriend that girl right away if he cares about your relationship. Step one. Then have a good talk with him and tell him what your boundaries are and hopefully from this point on he will be able to respect them. Tell him the first slip up or the first sign you see of him being involved in funny business with any other girl it will be over sooner than he can blink. And mean it. Step three. Watch his behaviour.I am curious, this girl he befriended on Snapchat, is that the one between his legs???If you want to forgive him, that is up to you. BUT keep your eyes on him from now on! Good luck.
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (10 November 2014):
 social media does it again! OK, go ahead and trust but verify that's your call. I'm afraid if the situation were reversed,say you'd gone to Ibizia or where ever and come home with bf pics following you. What would he do? Why not ask him that.
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