A
female
 ,
*strid
writes:I had a go with a boy in my course but did't have sex as I told him I only have it on a relationship basis and would prefer to know him better and so on, he told me to phone him and we agreed to date a week later but to muy surprise he look the other way when he came across me in the course 2 days later and started ignoring me but for asking me for notes and stuff, I was feeling down so I didn't ask him out and noticed he dates a girl for coffee or lunch while at uni, this is a girl who is in a raltionship with another boy who studies far( and she has been unfaithful to him with another bloke or two our uni). I decided to go on with my stuff anda say nothing but we 3 know people in common who go on messing around remembering me we got off and showing they have fun he's messing around with this girl... Now I don't want anything to do with that people at all the guy I got off with starts staring at me again and doing like he likes me and that we are frieds sometime but we are not...Any tips why I felt down so much at the star and how I should cope??? Should I be harsh to the boy I got off with so he keeps away and doens't pretend we are friends and benefits from it? should I tell offthe friends we have in common if they talk to me about him again i don't really feel comfy about this sometime LOVE AND THANKS IN ADVANCE Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Astrid +, writes (12 May 2008):
Astrid is verified as being by the original poster of the question I seriously appreciate your good advice, at 1st I thought there was something wrong about me but thanks to your help I feel ok about what I did and can move on, I will not talk about it to anyone who wants to mess around and if they cannot accept it then we wont be friends; about the boy I wont let him take profit of me acting natural despite what happened between us, we're not friends and if he needs notes or whatever I am not to be always there for him he'll have to do his things on his own I will keep my guard up not to be hurt or misstreated.love and good luck
A
female
reader, mylonleyself  +, writes (5 May 2008):
 That has happened to me too. I had this good friendship(that is what I thought) with this guy at school, he was amazingly friendly and treated me like his girlfriend, everyone thought we were dating even though we weren't. Anyways, he started to ask me to go to his apartment and I never did, he started to call at night and ask me for sex in subtle ways and I told him that I wasn't going to have sex with anyone until I got in a serious relationship or married. The one last call he did to me was about him wanting to have sex with me, I said no.. and his response to me was to never ever talk to him again, that I was just a waste of time. It hurt to hear such thing, but now years after I am glad I didn't give in to his prepositions. I feel like I did great, I did like the guy but if he didn't want to respect my decision then he was a guy not worth my time.
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A
female
reader, Rhian2020  +, writes (4 May 2008):
Hello,
First of all well done for saying no to having sex with him if you weren't comfortable with it. I don't think that you should go with this guy. It's obvious that he's using you because if he really liked you then he would make the effort to talk to you all the time and not only when he wants your notes. I think that you're better off without him. As for your friends tell them that you don't want to talk about him anymore. If they are your real friends then they will listen. Only you can decide whether you want to continue being friends with him.
Good luck.xx.
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