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I care about him but don't love him... how can I let him down gently?

Tagged as: Breaking up<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 June 2007) 5 Answers - (Newest, 11 July 2007)
A female United States age , *ayth writes:

I am involved with a man whom I have had a child with. I care about him but do not love him. I am concerned about hurting him if I tell him I would like to be friends but I don't want a future with him. How can I end this without feeling guilty?

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A female reader, fayth United States +, writes (11 July 2007):

fayth is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks to all who answered my question....You all had great insights ..everything I already knew but needed to hear it from others.

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A female reader, heyheyhey United Kingdom +, writes (13 June 2007):

heyheyhey agony auntI think it is unfair to do that to him. He is probably a nice man and deserved to be loved in that way. Someone dear to me right now who is in a relationship with someone that doesn't love her - she does everything possible for this man. Everyone can see it but her, she may be in denial or the pain of rejection keeps her there. Yes it would hurt now but it is better to do it now than years down the line when the effect will be worst. Just perhaps tell him you are wanting different things, you feel your paths has changed and you will always have love for him no matter what - something along those lines. Good luck!

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom + , writes (13 June 2007):

kenny agony auntIf you don't love him then you have got to tell him sooner rather than later, the longer you leave it the harder it will get.

Sometimes in this life we have got to be cruel to be kind, its better to tell him how you feel now than to go on letting him think you love him when you don't. Tell him soon and it will be a weight off of your shoulders, sure he will be hurt but in time he will be thankful you were honest with him.

Good luck x

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2007):

To be honest, I don't think there is any way of letting him down gently; either way it's probably going to hurt.

If i were you, I would sit him down and tell him exactly how you feel.

Honesty is the best policy.

I hope everything goes ok.

:)

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A female reader, YummyMummy United Kingdom +, writes (13 June 2007):

YummyMummy agony auntI dont think there is a way of ending it that doesnt leave you feeling guilty but if you are sure you really dont want to be with him then you should end it.

Sit down with him and chat the situation through and explain why you feel the way you do.

Good luck!

xxx

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