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I can't tell if the date went well. He hasn't called, is that bad?

Tagged as: Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 September 2011) 3 Answers - (Newest, 9 September 2011)
A female United States age 36-40, *ixieGwen writes:

Went on a date w this guy on monday. We met from online. He seemed nice, opened doors, took me out to a nice sushi restaurant.i guess he was nervous because he was willing to change his shirt, if I didnt like it, kept reminding me he can be sarcastic. I was incredibly nervous n when he asked how it was going, I said its going. (i dunno y I said that) I become braindead when tired + nervous. He Was Also tired at the end So after dinner he asked if he could walk me to my door.so he did, n he said that we should get together again when we're both more rested. I agreed and hugged him and went in. I had to stop by the grocery store, so 2 min after he left, I called and invited him (dumb huh? I clearly wasnt thinking ) he seemed interested but then,said he was tired and declined. so the next day, w a clear head...i felt dumb for my invite. So I said" btw, despite my nervousness/ tired/zombie moment at the end, I had a good time, justa fyi if I hadnt said so". I remembered thanking him for dinner but thats it. So I sent him that txt, to let him know I was nervous and I had a good time. I dont think too clearly when tired n nervous but.cant do anything bout that. Havent heard from him. We met monday, I txted tuesday...and so far nothing. Does it look bad? I mean..i have a feeling he won't call.

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A female reader, Lola1 Canada +, writes (9 September 2011):

Lola1 agony auntI would move forward as though he won't call. If he does, that is nice, but he took a long time to do so, and I would expect him to always disappoint in that capacity.

He knows you liked him and want to see him again. He is either keeping you waiting or choosing not to see you again.

Whether he contacts you or not, he is clearly not that 'into you'. It's not what you wanted to hear and I am sorry for that, but the good news is you are free to pursue or be pursued by someone who is better able to appreciate your company.

Good luck! :-)

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A reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2011):

I say give it the three day rule. If he hasn't contacted you in three days then contact him and say, "I was wondering if we can get together again sometime." If he declines or accepts, then you know for sure, and that will be that. Don't obsess over it. There are more fishes in the sea.

In my experience I find that if a guy really likes you he will contact you again right away or very often, the more he likes you the more often. But instead of sitting around getting depressed and over analyzing, using that basic rule will let you know if he is interested, and if not you can just move on.

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (9 September 2011):

eyeswideopen agony auntI'm afraid nothing to do but wait and see. Just don't make anymore contact before he does.

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