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age
18-21,
writes: Is it true that opposites attract? My bf and I have been going out for a little over 2 years now, we are like any other teenage couple which has been going out for quite a while, and still like eachother very much even though we have both changed over the time we have been together. We are almost completely opposite, and this sometimes balances things out, but at other times, it can be really frustrating to not have someone who agrees with you on things very often or who has different ideas of what is to be expected by a gf/bf etc.So then comes guy#2. Hes also my age, and is also in a long term relationship with a girl, who is also one of my friends. I am close to both him and his gf, however over time have grown closer to him as friends. We help each other out with relationship problems, talk about friends, school, family, random silly things etc. You get the idea. Guy#1 i have known for so long, and had so many good times with, but it has really died down and the fights we get into happen again and again. I feel less appreciated by him than before, and usually feel like i like him more then he likes me (sorry if that sounds childish).With Guy#2, everything seems fresh again, and on top of that, we have so much in common, he makes me laugh, he appreciates things about me which guy#1 never does. I find myself going to sleep at night thinking about Guy#2 more than my bf....Do i have to choose? What do i do =/ ?Guy#2 has a gf! one of my friends! and lives much further away, but we talk alot more.Maybe i shouldnt even be considering it?!I dont want to cause trouble, but i dont know what to do. Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (31 March 2008):
 You could be falling for guy No.2 whether you think it will cause trouble or not.
You maybe living in denial.
If your guy No.1 is unsatisfactory and he does not change,
then you should consider moving on without him.
There are just too many pot holes on this road.
As to the guy no.2 , you can continue to be friends until he choose you over her .
A
female
reader, carolinecooper  +, writes (30 March 2008):
 Hello :)
I think you need to do a list of Pros and Cons of the guys...sometimes it works to choose something.Life is really hard but your relation with the guy1 seems to be less interesting than with the guy2.It's difficult because guy2 isn't alone...Maybe you need to speak with guy2 and tell you've got a crush on him!!!Then,you'll see his reaction,maybe he loves you like a friend or maybe he loves you more than you think.Do you pass a lot of time with him? (i mean alone,without his GF)Is guy2's GF,your BFF?????
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A
female
reader, Miss C  +, writes (30 March 2008):
 It could be a passing phase for now. You say that you talk to Guy ## 2 about relationship problems but shouldn't you be discussing this with your boyfriend instead. It's okay to have other friends to talk to about relationship problems with but in these cicrumstances it's different since you have feelings for him and seem emotonally attached.
For now I think you should do your best to work on things with your current guy. You have been dating a long time and it's common for things to die down in relationships where doubts and queries arise and you are perhaps bored of the same thing.
I think you want what you can't have and maybe this is why the guy you're attracted to is completely the opposite from your boyfriend in that as you say he appreciates thigns about you that your boyfriend doesn't. Perhaps the need to feel desired is what you miss and you feel you an seek that from Guy # 2. If htis is a potential probelm then tell your boyfriend about it. Perhaps he doesn't realise he's neglecting you in this way.
I can't say whether or not these feelings for Guy # 2 are the real deal but please, at least make an attempt to work on things with your boyfriend before deciding the relationship has run it's course. If it does however come to the point where you do decide to leave him then don't assume you can jump into a relationship with Guy # 2. He's off limits remember and is with your friend. Is he worth breaking up a friendship? I sincerely doubt any guy is that special. Hope this has helped! Miss C xx
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