A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am finding it very hard to trust my boyfriend and it's killing me, he has kissed another girl and then a few weeks later asked the same girl to dance with him when he knew how I felt. I have also found messages he has sent to other girls telling then how sexy they are and that he loves them. I have been with him for 2 years now and he hasn't done anything to hurt me for a while now but I am forever growing more suspicious even though he really hasn't got the time of day to cheat on me. I don't know whether it's me or him with the problem - any advice? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2008): the fact you are even staying with him after he cheated on you is really surprising.he's a piece of shit, why are you wasting ur time? the blunt truth is: u dont treat someone who you care about like that.
A
male
reader, polarkite  +, writes (8 February 2008):
 Unless you two have an "open relationship", this guy's behavior is *not cool*. An "open relationship" is where you are together, but can have other partners as well.
Maybe this guy wants an "open relationship" because he's acting like it. You need to communicate about what types of behavior with other partners is acceptible and where a line must be drawn.
Have a talk with him. Ask him how he'd feel if you went to the dance someone and kissed them. See what he says.
You might need to break it off with this guy if ultimately you can't reach an equitable relationship where both of you are getting what you want.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2008): Oh my! I used those very same words to my ex-boyfiend when I dumped him. "I can't trust you and it's killing me." All he'll do is cause you pain and keep you insecure.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (8 February 2008):
 You need to learn to trust him and reign in your jealous streaks.You have got to allow some space for his private life and not want to control everything he does. If he flirts with other girls, know it is just for the fun only.You also enjoy some flirting attentions from the males.
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A
male
reader, useiwayne +, writes (8 February 2008):
 Dump him! If this person were serious about your happiness, the treatment you describe would not have existed. FACT: if a person finds you special, and they WANT YOU, their actions will all be extensions of that desire for you; whatever they do, it will have your feelings in mind.
This person's actions are not honorable, and are clearly aimed at garnering attention from other ladies. Find someone who will appreciate you and treat you like you matter! Don't waste your time, or go through emotional heartache for someone who doesn't want you anyway. Find the person who DOES want you, and you will NEVER face this kind of anguish again!
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