A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Not Sure If You Can Help But Here Goes...........I have been with my husband for 19 years, we have been through quite a lot of things in this time, 5 miscarriages,a serious accident,to name just a few.Since Oct 07 he started to gain extra stress from his job, he kept coming home tired and slightly short tempered, when asked if everything was ok he would say it was, so in the end i stopped asking and presumed all was well.In may 08 i discovered he had a fling with another woman.He finished it and said he never loved her,i threw him out but found it so hard i felt like commiting suicide, because of this he came back,but within a week of this he said he had come back for the wrong reasons and went again. He is staying with family.He has always been reliable, dependable, caring,loving,generous and my soul mate. All of his behaviour was so out of character that i felt he was suffering with depression and started to research it on the net. I found out about burnout caused by excess stress, and we talked about this and he agreed with me that he felt this was what was wrong.I have invested all my strength and energy in looking after our kids, home, my job but more importantly my husband.He is loved, forgiven,cherished. I have decorated 2 rooms whilst he has been gone, taken on all the jobs he used to do and also turned into the most sexiest wife a man could want.....this experience has liberated me and made me realise what i too want out of my life.Has anyone else been through similar with their partners and burnout, as although we are still married we are living apart whilst he recharges his batteries, he is mentally,emotionally and physically drained. i love him and want to make the marriage work. What hope do you think there is.How long before he is well enough to come home?
View related questions:
soulmate Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (9 June 2008):
 Keep up your good work as a single parent and I pray to God to
give you more wisdom and understandings and your family to be reunited again as earliest as possible.
Have faith in God and be patient.
Your love and understandings will pull you through this crisis in your life.
A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (8 June 2008):
 NOW!!! Simple, isn't it. The problem here is, you were not the cause of his being misdirected. His family is not the cause of his emotional or physical draining. So what happens. He leaves the strength and support of family to recharge, but the outside forces are still there no matter if he's at home or elsewhere.
Families can be strong when staying together to work through issues. Going it along can be more damaging than bringing the real issues to the table, and having support to overcome them.
It sounds like he's off balance. he needs to find the cause of it and realign his activities to bring his sense of self back to being balance.
You were a bit off balanced as well, prior to this change. How do you feel after you've made changes in your life and improving your sense of self? That's the difference between being in balance or off balance.
Take care. I wish you happiness.
...............................
|
