A
female
age
18-21,
pink kitty
writes:Ok this question is aimed mostly at the men. I want to know what is the right way to approach a guy about being safe with sex. I like to wait a few months before getting into sex and my first bf and were virgins so there was not a whole lot of talk about sex history but with the next guy I refuse to do it unless I know for sure that it is safe. And a guy telling me that he is clean is not good enough, i would need proof, but how would i go about all this in a snsitive manner. I would not want to upset the guy but I also don't want to be kicking myself in the butt if I were to contract something. Sorry for the long post but this wuestions has been bugging me for a long time. Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Annalisa + ♥, writes (5 February 2008):
I agree, that's why I said that if you're emotionally intimate you can talk about anything! I meant, if you wait to be closer before you have sex, you should be able to talk about safe sex before you make love for the first time.
If my partner asked me, I would be happy he took interest, because hopefully he's done the same before! I like to have regular check-ups, although I'm married now and never really had casual and unprotected sex. It's just for peace of mind, really. I don't think anyone with any commonsense would be offended.
A
female
reader, pink kitty +, writes (5 February 2008):
pink kitty is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you so much mandy that link was helpful. thanks as well Annalisa but I think that talking about sex comes before having sex and I'm not the person to just hop in bed right away.I guess I also want to know what kind response anyone would have to their partner asking about their sexual history and also how they would feel if their partner asked them to get tested??
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A
female
reader, Annalisa + ♥, writes (5 February 2008):
It all depends on whether you want to get emotionally intimate before you have sex. If you are good friends in love, you can talk about anything. If you just want to have sex whenever you're ready, carry condoms with you and make sure he always wears one when you're about to do it.
You can usually get some idea from a man's lifestyle, whether he's likely to be safe. Does he scratch himself a lot? When you see him naked, don't go near him if his penis looks all spotty/sore, etc. If he looks fine, use a condom. In time, as you get closer and decide to stop using them, suggest you both go in for a check-up together!
My suggestion is, if you can't talk to your partner openly, wait before you get intimate!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2008): Hi Hunny
I aint no man but Ive found you a helpfull link that may ease your worries love.http://www.condomman.com/articles/relationships/how-to-discuss-intimacy-and-safe-sex-in-a-relationship/
Hope this helps hunny TAKE CARE WITH LOVE N HUGS MANDY xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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