A
female
age
36-40,
*opeless inlove
writes:Yes affairs are wrong but if you fall inlove with someone and they feel the same and you determine it's not infatuation and what you feel is love. How do you stop seeing that person and leave them if you love them so much? But deep down you know you have to do the right thing but your heart hurts.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 February 2012): You don't know while you are in an affair.
That is the problem.
Almost nobody ends up with their affair partner, and if they do they almost always break up, and if they don't the almost never trust each other.
Why?
Because they were involved in cheating.
End your marriage and see what happens with the affair partner, then you will find out what it is like to have a real relationship. Many affair partners aren't capable of it, they haven't learned that yet and that is why they have the affair, not something "real and lasting".
A
female
reader, Sweet-thing  +, writes (26 February 2012):
 If you were realy into doing the right thing you wouldn't be in this dilema. Therefore you have to ask yourself what is missing in your marriage that led you to this affair? Yes you may have been attracted to this new guy but you should have been able to exercise some restraint if you really loved your spouse. You should take a good long look at your marriage and decide if you are with the right person or if you are just tempted easily. You may need counseling to get past the urges you have or to sort out the real reasons you had an affair. Sometimes admitting to yourself that you are not in love with the man you married is a very difficult thing and one that should be weighed carefully. There is alot at stake here. Good luck.
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