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female
,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend of 10 months seems to want to spend every second with me, everyday. I enjoy spending time with him but it seems like we dont do anything, we just hang out. How can i have my own space, but still spend time with him? And how do i tell him i need some time to myself? Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, helpful girl  +, writes (17 August 2006):
 like me and my boyfreind we spend 3 days a week with each other after moveing out from him. all you say is listen i like my own space which understandable im not breaking up with you but i think if we see each other a few days a week it make our ralationship brilliant or in stead why dont you when he rings or knocks on your door say to him listen im really busy think of something you can be busy doing then say im gonna stay in 2night and do that a few times a week.
A
male
reader, Dazzerg + ♥, writes (16 August 2006):
 I think you need to be firm and clear. You obviously know this guy better than me or anybody else but its possible he is very insecure. As such you need to be gentle and subtle as well as asserting yourself encourage him to take up and do things with his own space too.
He may wrongly take the assertion of your own space as a form of rejection so you also need to cushion the blow if you can by the positives of how you feel about him. Reassure him in that way but dont let him wriggle around you.
I also think there are two seperate issues here; you having your own space and how you use the time you do spend together. Maybe you can take the lead in suggesting something that you want to do; maybe a movie you want to see for the next time you spend together. Hope that helps. Take care.
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