A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I know its none of my business, but I cant help but to wonder about my girlfriend's past relationships (what all she did with them).Why do I do this, and how do I stop? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, JackBauer +, writes (18 April 2007):
 It's tough, I go through the same thing with my gf. I trust her with all my heart and love her to death. As long as you can trust your gf, there's nothing to worry about. Worrying about what happened in the past is something you can't change since it already happened. Focus on the 2 of you in the present and towards the future.
A
male
reader, nologo  +, writes (17 April 2007):
 Your girlfriend's past relationships is her past.
It's part of her experience and belongs to history.
She does not refer to that in her thinking when she is with you, and you should not do that either.
Back to your question: "Why do I do this, and how do I stop?"
You do this because you don't have as much experience as she.
How to stop: focus on the present - her feelings toward you.
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A
female
reader, chrissy32789 +, writes (17 April 2007):
 Dear anonymous writer,
Just ask her what she did with her ex cause you are curious to find out, but when she answers you dont get all pissed with her and cant stop thinking about it, but try to forget it and not worrie about it just think about you and her..i wanted to know what my fiance did with his ex and i couldnt stop thinkin about it intil i asked him and now i feel better about it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2007): This is a sure killer for a relationship to flourish, anon.. You must take her for who she is and what you found appealing in her when you first began. At this age, she probably does not have more of a "past" than you do. Put the obsession out of your head. Concentrate on your relationship with her now, and how she feels toward you. And forget the questions. If you begin putting her on the stand, you are sure to lose her. Think about the situation being reversed and how you would feel. Best wishes, Tom
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