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How do I stop getting my hopes up?

Tagged as: The ex-factor<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (26 October 2009) 3 Answers - (Newest, 26 October 2009)
A male United Kingdom age 51-59, anonymous writes:

hi please help

as previousley posted - my girlfriend endedd our relationship in april - i suspected that she was seeing someone else and guess what within a week she said she was ina relationship.

Like a fool I chased and chased her - but she just said leave her alone - I wrote her an email saying ok your right Im sorry and left her alone

Since then she has emailed my on a couple of occaisons

The first time I melted and told her I still loved her - bang the emails stopped

The second time I was a little more wise but as soon as she asked if I was ok the emails stopped again and she wasquite cold - she has emailed me a couple of timesthis month each time she asks if Im ok then gone no response

what should I do - because each time she emails my head goes to pieces Im getting to the stage that I just cant cope with it and is making me ill

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2009):

time to move on

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A female reader, pinktopaz United States +, writes (26 October 2009):

Block her email or just don't email her back anymore. She's going to keep doing what she's doing and you're going to keep feeling the same way, so just cut her out of your life for good.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2009):

You really need to move on from this painful breakup and the only way to do that is to cut all contact off from her.

That means changing your email or blocking hers, changing your phone number if you have to do so, and getting rid of all reminders around your home of her, gifts, photos, etc, because even though you may not be aware of it, these "things" can act like a trigger to bring up your painful negative emotions.

By still answering her emails, etc, you are just prolonging the healing process. If after a few months to a year you feel like you are over things, then you might be able to just be friends with her. She has clearly moved on, she is in another relationship, she may have even dumped you for him, who needs that?

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