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How do I prepare myself for anal sex?

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Question - (5 October 2009) 6 Answers - (Newest, 5 October 2009)
A female age 30-35, *exi star writes:

Well i wanna have anal sex but im scared to.... Ive tried b4 but i think with just the little that the head has gone in it riped the sides and now every time i use the rr i sorta bleed but im scared more of the way it feels when the whole penis goes in how thats gunna feel how would i react to that...ive heard on other aunts some have pooped while theyve done it thats kinda gross to me but uhh besides that i wanna get over the fear and how to prepare myself and what to expect thanks alot :)

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A female reader, HereAreMyTwoCents United States +, writes (5 October 2009):

HereAreMyTwoCents agony auntOk, I don't want to scare you, I personally find anal sex immensely painful. Other women, however, have found a way to like it or at least tolerate it.. If I had to give you advice here is what it would be...

1) LOTS AND LOTS OF LUBE. As much lube as humanly possible.

2) Go very very very very very slow to begin with.

3) Establish before hand that YOU, the bearer of the anus, and not him, the bearer of the penis, gets to be the one who controls the act. When you say STOP, he must STOP. When you say SLOWER, he must go slower... No questions asked. If he ever at any point asks why, tell him that if he wants to find out why, you will be more than happy to strap on a dildo for him, so he can share in your experience.

4) Make sure you've emptied your bowels before you start. Anal sex will definitely make you feel like you want to poop, whether or not there is anything in there to actually poop out. This is because, well, if you put a penis in the anal canal, it's the same feeling you get as if poop was going through it, only more intense, because it's a hard penis, not a soft poop!

5) I highly recommend him wearing a condom, for his sake. There are bacteria lurking around in the anal canal, that are just not meant to come into contact with anything except the water in the toilet bowl.

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A female reader, leo3 United States +, writes (5 October 2009):

leo3 agony auntuse lube or a condom, my ex LOVED to do that and i let him cuz whatever. its not terrible , it really hurts at first, and it never ended up feeling good it was just really uncomfortable, but bearable i guess. not my favorite thing to do, bu got for it if u want...good luck

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A female reader, ffogalilly United States +, writes (5 October 2009):

I would use lube, but if you're not comfortable with it, tell your partner no, I did. But use lube, that will make things much easier.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2009):

Ok, first there are many places on the web to get really good detailed information- the best IMO is:

http://www.allsexadvice.com/forum/forum24.html

This is the all sex advice- anal avenue forum.

Anal takes work to pull off, but it's well worth it. First, you need to take your time. If you start digital play (fingers) and work up to a small dildo, it might take several weeks. Do not rush getting a dick inside you as this will be painful if your not ready.

If you're still seeing some blood when you use the toilet, you need to give it a few weeks and focus on healing. Make sure that you get lots of fiber and drink lots of water. Don't sit long on the toilet and be as gental with your bottom as you can.

When you're not seeing blood, start trainig your body to accept something going into it... start with a finger, then two, then a toy... slowly... when you can train your ass to relax your ready for the real thing.

When you do this, first make sure he knows that you're in control and that if he behaves he's in for a MAJOR treat, but if he's bad, the back door will never be open again!

Take control, have him lube you up really good, and himself. He should be using a condom for a variety of reasons, but creating a smooth hard cock is one of them. Lay on you stomach, and have him lay on top of you, with the head on your anus. When your ready push out (like your trying to poo) and have him apply a slight bit of pressure. You tell him when to stop, and go (and pull out if need be). Once the head is in, you'll likely need him to stop so you can get used to the feeling, then proceed to the second spinkter (there are 2 of them) and repeat. Once he gets that far in, he should be able to gently slide all the way in, and rest. Once your OK with him moving, he should gently start thrusting.

There shouldn't be any poo, mess, smell... no enema's needed, no specail cleaning... if you want to fine, but it's not required.

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A male reader, Candleman United States +, writes (5 October 2009):

Candleman agony auntHowdy,

I love this website I am sharing. It is full of excellant information.

http://www.the-clitoris.com/f_html/fr_index.htm

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2009):

lubelubelubelubelube. I cant say it enough. Take it slow and lube. And then lube some more.

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