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How do I make hubby last longer?

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (29 March 2012) 5 Answers - (Newest, 30 March 2012)
A female United States age 30-35, *zabella637 writes:

I have been married for 3 months now and my husband and i have sex with a condom because we are still going to school and dont want to have kids at the moment we have sex 3 times a week but each time with foreplay our sex is about 15 mins long, he cums too fast and i want it to go longer, what can i do to make him last longer?

View related questions: condom, foreplay, last longer

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2012):

look at the bright side. he loves you so much that he can't hold it for long when he starts to touch you. at least you don't need to feel insecure about him loving you or enjoying you enough ;)

do more foreplay but remember that he needs to enjoy the foreplay too. if it gets boring for him, he will lose interest (and erection). do something that you both enjoy.

if you are newly married and new to sex, there is a good chance that he can get ready again in a few minutes after he cums. stay in bed after he finishes and do it again. he will last longer the second time.

what kind of condoms do you use? use the ones that are designed to make him last longer. they are commercially called "extended pleasure" condoms.

or, he can masturbate a few hours before you make love.

about you, there are a few things that you can do to help him:

if he decides to go oral on you before penetration (which is a good idea), you can help him by giving him a vagina that tastes and smells good. he will enjoy eating you and he will do it as much as you want.

relax your vagina during penetration so that you don't squeeze his penis too much.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2012):

You need to lengthen the period of foreplay, i.e., the period before actual penetrative sex. Explain to him that you enjoy your love-making and - as gently as possible - that you need longer to achieve orgasm than him.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2012):

During intercourse, slow him down with lingering kisses which should slow him down a bit.

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A male reader, Sageoldguy1465 United States +, writes (29 March 2012):

Sageoldguy1465 agony auntYOu can't do a darn thing "to make him last longer."

What you CAN do is say to him, "Honey, you know when "we" make love, there's another person there in bed? ("it's me")... and it might take me longer than 15 minutes to experience orgasmic pleaures?..... Do you suppose that YOU might focus on ME, for a change?, and see to it that I get a "complete" pleasant experience during our sexual forays?????"

IF he sez, "Huh?" ... then you are in deep trouble. Otherwise, he will hear and understand what you've said... and the next time should be like Nirvana....

I guarantee it....

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A male reader, doublejack United States +, writes (29 March 2012):

One thing I was going to suggest is to use a condom, since that generally causes men to last longer than without one. That happens because of the loss of sensation. However, I see that you and your husband already use condoms.

The only other thing I can come up with is for him to have more frequent orgasms. In my case, the more frequently I have sex the more time it will take me to achieve an orgasm each time I try. If I'm having sex 7+ times a week, it can take me up to an hour or more sometimes before I finish. On the other hand, if I have sex once a week I can come in just a few minutes.

However, is the time your husband lasts really the core issue here? Or rather is it that he finishes before you have had a chance to climax, and you're left wanting more? If it's the latter, then there are many things the two of you can do.

For example, what about more foreplay? Perhaps he can give you oral sex before he penetrates you, bringing you to an orgasm before intercourse even starts. Alternately, he could finger you or use whatever method you prefer to get you excited.

Another option, and this is my girlfriend's preference, is for me to enjoy myself and have my orgasm, and when I'm done we "finish her off" using a vibrator. Sometimes she uses the vibrator during intercourse, and other times she saves it until after. For additional stimulation I use my fingers on her, or I'll use a dildo, or if I get hard again I'll reinsert, while also using the vibrator. Incorporating toys into your sex life can give you that extra stimulation you need!

Best of luck!

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