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How do I leave him?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (8 August 2007) 3 Answers - (Newest, 9 August 2007)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

well hi i need advise my relationship is starting seem as its falling apart and im real hurt and confussed,

my bf of over a year isnt as loving and doesnt seem to want to spend any time with me and im starting to feel as everything is more important than me and due to him moving far away to be near hes mom i also feel as he picked her over me and our baby im pregnant with. he calls me every night and some times on hes breaks at work but he started asking me to sleep on the phone with him and i feel as he does this so he doesnt have to talk to me very long and can go to bed i do understand hes tired from work but i do need time to i always make time for him.

im not real sure what to do any more and im starting to feel as our relationship is over but i cant seem to leave him i love him so much the words wont come out and if i talk to him about something he breaks down and crys saying hes a bad bf and making me feel bad so ill forget about what i was saying and if not that he will say i am thrown things in hes face and start bringing up things i need to change then he does nothing but act like the fight never happend we are young im 18 hes 22, im always ready to leave but not sure how since im suck over a phone and i dont know what to say i just want to leave and stop this its really getting to me

what should i say when he calls ?

how can i leave with being abled to go thru with it ?

i have very lil family and gave up all my friends to hes jealious so how do i get thru this time ?

please help me please i cant cry no more for this man but cant seem to leave him

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A female reader, penta United States +, writes (9 August 2007):

penta agony auntYou're right to take a break to see what you want. Sounds like you need to get away from him.

See a lawyer and make sure he takes care of the baby. When you get a sense of finality you'll feel better and start to heal. Good luck.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2007):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

i can go see him because i cant afford it right now and i cant seem to get him to come see me ive went in seen him the last two times but i think i am done talking and im startingto think i am going to give it a few days to talk to him so i can think about what i want and what is best for the baby and the time away from the stress would do me and the baby good but thank you

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A female reader, penta United States +, writes (8 August 2007):

penta agony auntYou and he need to sit down together and talk about what you both want for the future. It sounds like you're not sure what he wants, but he's pulling away from you. And this hurts too much so you want to leave him.

See if you can make an appointment with a counselor to talk about the future. (Maybe you can find one in his neighborhood and travel there?) With the baby there's a lot to be decided. If he doesn't want to be with you, he needs to level with you. He also doesn't get to get out of providing for the baby.

If he won't go to a counselor, then you should go to a lawyer. You need to make him legally responsible for the child.

then call some of your old friends and try to reconnect. You're going to need support, and it doesn't sound like he's willing to be there for you. Good luck hon.

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