A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:How do you know when to choose a great career opportunity over the love of your life, or choose your love over the career opportunity? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, digitalent  +, writes (2 November 2010):
If he's truly the love of your life then you have nothing to worry about. Go for your big career opportunity and if he really is what you say he is, then he'll support you all the way through. He wouldn't make you chose.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (2 November 2010):
 If you gotta ask, then the person is not the love of your life. I mean, if you can contemplate the possibility of willingly give up your love without being forced to that by circumstances beyond your control,..then that person represents an important relationship, but not "the love of your life ".
Anyway,call me an old cynical, but perhaps I'd choose career regardless. Career is not only about money, it's about your realization, your sense of self, about making your mark in this world in your own unique special way. If you chance into a really great opportunity to do just that, it's a pity not grabbing it,because it may be your one shot .
Instead, I think there is not one single love, one single soulmate.
Love is not a specific person or quality, love is an energy that expands and contracts at different times in different stages of your life.
When you are ready within, and the circumstances are right, true love will show up again. And again. Otherwise there never would be second marriages, no ?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2010): Good question.
What makes someone the Love or Your Life.
If it is the love of your life, you wouldn't be asking this question...you would have already decided to make that commitment.
Believe me, I know, and the answer is ALWAYS you will choose the "Love of Your Life" if you recognize that person as such...but you have to recognize them as such and make them all that by dedicating yourself to them.
Which makes you vulnerable to them.
The bigger question is how can you be sure that the person is the "Love of Your Life". That is the hard part.
I met the Love of My Life and gave up a lot more than career opportunities and haven't regretted it....but before her there was someone else, who I thought was all that only to find that she wasn't that person....
Only by making yourself vulnerable and sacrificing does someone become the Love of Your Life.
As Nouvelle32 wrote, "True love doesn't come that often."
Damn straight advice.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (2 November 2010):
 Why must you choose? If the love of your life really meant something to you or if you meant something to your lover, would the career opportunity truly be such a difficult choice?
If the problem is time, I think it best that you leave that relationship because that love of your life will most likely feel neglected, you will cease to be in a real relationship in all but name.
If the problem is distance, would you consider a long distance relationship? You will most definitely have at least a few days off at certain periods of time, would you not use that time to be with your love? It may be difficult but, what relationships aren't?
If this person truly was the love of your life, the choice would not be so difficult. Career opportunities come and go. Should this one fade away, another would come along and arguably, the same can be said about 'the love of your life' except, careers and made and shattered whilst real, immense love is not so easily broken. Be careful when you call someone 'the love of your life', do not use such a phrase unless you are absolutely sure.
What is more important to you? Money or the undying glimmer of warmth you will have every time you look into your lover's eyes and fall into your lover's arms? Money is made everyday. But then again, perhaps you can have both money and love if your lover is willing to wait. It depends on how sure you are about this love you feel.
I hope that helps.
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A
female
reader, Nouvelle32  +, writes (2 November 2010):
Why can't you have both? Does this person not want to go with you? I guess it depends on how long you have been together. If it hasn't been that long, like less than a year, then it's a tough call. I always say, keep the love... but that's just me. Most ppl. would probably disagree. True love doesn't come that often.
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