A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I work at my church as a secretary but now I'm afraid this stranger is going to send a link to my sex blog to my employers and potentially ruin me. I have never looked at or worked on my blogs outside my home. I have a regular one where I blog about other things (mostly growing and cooking vegetables, herbs etc) that I've worked on from my lap top in the library or coffee shops but never the sex blog. A reader told me that we need to meet and added the address of a cheap motel in my area. He also asked if I lived on my street name and mentioned the church. None of that information is on my blogs. He had to have done some digging! He has messaged me about wanting to fulfill my fantasies unless I want everyone to know what I do on the side. How do I stop him and get him to leave me alone? This is supposed to be private!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2024): I'm the original poster
My sex blog is under a pseudonym-not even similar to any of my names. I allude to the region I'm in (southwest, southeast, midwest USA etc) by some descriptions in my stories but the towns, places of business etc are fictional. I've in the past had people DM me wanting to know where I live so they can "bump into me" but I tell them I'm not planning on meeting up and I block them. This guy is persistent with different accounts and creepy demands.
I thought I was careful, I only used my lap top and computer from home, didn't mention where I work of anything. I could have been Jane Doe, school secretary of Tulsa, AZ, I could have been Jill Smith, pastors wife of Jackson, Mississippi! I did take my blog down and tell readers what happened to a point. I blocked responses too.
I ended up telling the IT lady at our church and she told me she thought a lot could be done with an ISP number. She did some checking herself (for free) and found the person to be local and a guy who has visited our church several times. It's especially creepy because I'm not sure what compelled him to do what he did and I don't know how he got my ISP from home or how he knew where I lived
Taking him to court would out me to everyone and the point of a blog with a pseudonym was so I could be a part of myself uncensored that I can't be in public or around people I know. Is there no place like that?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2024): He's blackmailing you so do please block him. He's working on your fears. It's also a security issue. How has he found out what street you live on. Are you making too much public?
It does seem a contradiction that you work at a church while having a set blog though. Social media is public not private.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (17 March 2024):
 Do you know who he could be?
If so BLOCK him from your blog.? Set up some security on the blog? (if possible)
If you get outed, you get outed, you CHOSE to put a sex blog out there, it's unreasonable to expect no one will find it. YOU are responsible for the choices you make.
Not saying it's your fault you now have a stalker of sorts -I think whoever is doing this knows you or has been stalking you, so BE careful.
It sounds like blackmail - I don't know if the Police would or even could find out who he is. But it's something to consider.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2024): You have a LEGAL issue. Hopefully, you have records of everything he's sent you to prove you're being harassed and threatened. Did you tell him no or stop? Have you blocked him? Go to the POLICE, not the internet. You'll probably have to settle this in court which means it WILL come out that you write sex stories. Sorry, but I'm with the other poster on this: you should have thought of the potential consequences of sex work before diving into it.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2024): You don't. You accept the consequences of your actions and stop trying to live a double life. You may not have been posing naked and selling porn but you're still a sex worker. Bad move church secretary.
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