A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am 19 years old and have only had two partners (one when I was very young) and another recently so not that experienced. He is now my ex but still curious as to how i can get better at riding. Everything else during the sex was good the mental connection was there definitely and The sex felt very pleasurable for me and I think him as well but the one part I am feeling insecure over is that although I feel in shape as i can do a good amount of cardio and am pretty strong for a girl, I felt that I could just not keep up with his level of stamina (even though he was not a super athletic, enduring guy) and sometimes I felt like some positions were awkward for me to move in (could this just be due to lack of experience? or nervous about "performing well" in the position?) and I felt that he (this could be insecurity) thought i sucked at the moving part. or thought i was lazy. I tried to give it my all throughout every experience but sometimes riding him was difficult. sometimes it seemed like he was in heaven. Sometimes i would ride him (in a car or on hard surface like the floor) and he would come almost instantly, get hard right after he came and I would get back on top of him and ride him and he would come again a minute later. Other times he could not keep his erection when i tried to ride him and I felt that I could not ride him fast enough or keep up with his thrusts in the girl on top position. I aways tried to move and in most positions i could keep up with his pace and it felt very pleasurable. But sometimes i would ride him and he couldn't keep his erection and then he would just flip me over . I'm not loose (I would also kegel throughout the whole experience for both of our pleasure) and he was about average size but sometimes when i was on top he would fall out of me a lot (could this just be due to both of our sexual inexperience??) I told him to communicate with me he said everything was great and for the most part he seemed like he enjoyed it but he was also the type of guy who "never wanted to hurt a girl's feelings" which was something I did not enjoy about him as a person but that's a different story. I think maybe I just needed to get more comfortable experimenting with different movements on top of him. And also sometimes when I was riding him he would thrust upward from under me leaving me feeling like I wasn't doing my job. I found that he would only stay hard if I was squatting (or standing on my feet) on a hard flat surface and bouncing up and down on him hard the entire time. Any advice?
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionJust wanted to say thanks for the detailed advice! It was extremely helpful to hear this from a man. Appreciate it!
A
male
reader, happy140 +, writes (27 August 2012):
 I think most of your doubts stem from lack of experience. He falling out for example is just lifting too high or him down thrusting too much. It has nothing to do with you being loose. Also when riding him on a hard surface you have more penetration as the body on the bottom has nowhere to go, unlike a bed when the body sinks lower into the mattress. Also the car or outside may have more to doo with “almost getting caught” than anything else hence his quick Cumming and instant recovery. I know it has a profound effect on me, unlike having sex in a safe secure environment, the risk factor is tantalizing. Also as for “flipping” you over that may be because he wants to be more aggressive and do the thrusting/penetration or it may be that your weight (does not matter if your 98 pounds or 200) may cause a LITTLE pain or uncomfortable feeling on his hip area. This has happened to me and I have needed to change positions because of that. I had NOTHING to do with how she was performing. If you really want to stay on top then ride him for a bit, get off, suck him, and climb back on. This gives him a break and will but your body in a new position when you remount. If you think you suck at the “moving part” you could not be further from the truth. Sometime we like the gentle, barley moving and other time we want thee ride of our life. You will know that by how bad he aggressively penetrates you back. If he is going all out to get deeper inside you then its time to ride him harder. If he lays there motionless or barley trying to penetrate you he wants slow gentle sex. I know I like the switch up when my wife does both. She may do it slowly, suck a litlle, and then ride all out like a wild cowgirl. It is great. There is no wrong way to have sex. You can also say things like “honey you like this, want me to f—k you faster, we love dirty talk from our clean womanly wives and girlfriends. Remember if he cums you did something right and keep it up. Ask questions during sex in a sexy manner your will get better answer than if you wait until after sex.
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