A
female
age
30-35,
*issSamanthamary
writes:my boyfriend moved away a few months ago and ive seen him a few times and everythings been good but now everysingle time we talk on the phone he gets mad at me or raises his voice and he always just says that i make him feel bad for everything and i dont do anything wrong at all , he said he was hanging up and i said okay i miss u and he was like why do u have to do that it makes me feel bad. i dont understand how thats so wrong , i dont no what im doing wrong but i just want to fix everything but i dont no what im doing wrong , everytime he freaks out or raises he=is voice to much i just hang up , im not a fighter and i hate being yelled at and hes saying hes not yelling at me but it sounds like it alot to me , and he sounds pissed off all the time and i just want things to go back to normal :( how do i get him to not yell at me anymore ? and make things go back to normal ? HELP :( Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2010): It's clear that he is yelling at you because he is feeling guilty for something he did or is doing. You said that he was yelling when you said that u missed him? Maybe the reason he feels so bad is because he feels bad that he moved away and thinks it's his fault that you two are not seeing eachother as often as you used to. He might also feel like, by you saying that you miss him, your rubbing in the fact that you two can't see eachother and it's all his fault, eventhough that isn't your intention at all. In any case you can't just hang up when he yells at you because as much as you may not like conflict you do, in fact love\like your boyfriend and if you want your relationship to last, especially long distance, you need to talk to him and tell him that it upsets you that he yells at you and you need to ask him why he gets so upset with you and what he doesn't like you saying to him. I think if you just open up to him and tell him what your thinking he will be a lot softer towards you. ... I hope this helps :)
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (2 May 2010):
You don't. The thing you have to understand right now is that to him, this IS normal. This is how he acts, and this is how he will continue to treat you. He isn't suddenly going to change. If he's yelling at you for no reason, then he has problems and you need to get away from him. Don't sit there being abused. Granted the distance between you two may be playing on his mind, but you mustn't sit there and have him shout and then hang up. Don't be treated that way.
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A
male
reader, IHateWomanBeaters  +, writes (2 May 2010):
 No point in having a long distance bf that yells at you.
End it.
Seriously
You are 16-17, so move on and live your life.
And no, you don't love him.
I promise you you don't.
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