A
male
age
41-50,
*nowAll
writes:I would like to know how to broach the topic of anal sex with my wife...I want her to do anal with me. I want her to wear a strap-on and have anal sex with me. I'm uncomfortable asking her to do so but the thought of it turns me on. Has any body done this here? Please help
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2015): My fiancé just straight up asked. But we have that type of relationship. Maybe with out exactly asking when you are going down on her gently run and lick the anus. Or when you in doggy do some light rubbing working up to potential penitraiting it with your pinky. You will instantly know how you should approach the situation. She will wither shoo you off or beg for more. I do not know your wife but I know i just shoo my man off and sometimes I'm into it.
Don't just try to slip from the V to the bum. Suttle touches will really help guid you to your next step.
A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (25 January 2015):
 My instant respo prior to self-edit was "from the rear". However that was a "that's what she said' response and in poor taste. So, after my self edit my official response is; are you nuts? If she's not into it then you should drop the subject and give up trying to force or convince her to do anything she's not compfortable with doing. If she was into that sort of thing, you'd know by now so give it a rest. Deep breaths; Some women like it most don't. learn to live with the facts and stop the fantasy.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 January 2015): Bringing up alternative sex-acts and extreme-sex can often bring on high-anxiety; and many questions may arise from your spouse that you don't know how to answer.
When it comes to sexuality about her man; most women will come-up with their own conclusions with or without an explanation from you. The most common will be that you're not satisfied with her in some way; and you'll go elsewhere if she isn't comfortable with it. She will also wonder if there is something wrong with you? So you must be prepared.
If she has a conservative up-bringing, isn't that sexually adventurous; and lives by a strict system of values, it is reasonable to conclude she may be appalled by such a request. You be the judge about that!
If you can answer her questions honestly and know why; then you'll "figure-out" for yourself how to ask. How can anyone here tell you how your wife will react or respond? I will simply bring up possible scenarios; and then let you configure a custom-made approach based on how well you know your spouse.
You know your wife and her values. Sometimes you can come-up with things that you should question yourself about. Anal and strap-on-sex very much mimics gay-sex.
Lesbians sometimes use strap-ons. Gay men frequently want and submit to anal-sex. Gay men who like anal-sex,sometimes (not always) refer to themselves as "bottoms." Can you handle that? Before you spring it on your wife, be able to handle it yourself.
Your wife will wonder why(?) you want to be penetrated, and why(?) you want to enter her anally; when that's what the front was designed for. Then she'll wonder what you'll do if the answer is "no," and with whom have you've done this before? Have you had anal-sex with other women (or men), or are you gay? These are rhetorical questions from me; but you had better be prepared for these questions from your wife. She may not ask, but she may wonder all the same.
She may submit to please you, but may hate it; or like it very much. If she does, how will that change your opinion of her? I know people very well. They never look at the whole picture. They see only the surface, or what they want to see. You can't be selfish, it has to be pleasurable for both of you.
The Kama Sutra is an ancient text of sexual positions composed in India somewhere between 400BC and 200BC. Perhaps introducing her to a more adventurous mindset by letting her relate through tradition, it might make it easier to introduce new sex-toys and techniques.
So make sure you're ready when you open that Pandora's Box.
Once you bring it up, you can't delete it from her mind and how she processes it.
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A
female
reader, Midnight Shadow  +, writes (25 January 2015):
 I think you have to figure out how open-minded she is before bringing it up.
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