A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have been with this guy for almost two years and has had a miscarriage this year for him. The relationship is only a friends with benefits type situation until I got pregnant and had to have surgery cause I was pregnant in my tube so my baby died. He has flirted with other girls in front of me and so on. What do I do to get him out of my life and to try to move on cause I am an emotional wreck because of this man. It hurts me so bad that people treat other people this was. I'm crying all the time and I think my health is falling me. Can you please tell me what I can do to get over this situation. Please help me
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female
reader, YouWish +, writes (19 June 2010):
 First, I'm so very sorry you had to go through the pain and pregnancy. I can only imagine how awful that made you feel. I hope you're okay physically, and I wish the best for you emotionally.
That being said, this is exactly the problem with "friends with benefits". The very rules of FWB means NO emotions and NO strings, meaning he could flirt with anyone he wants anywhere anytime. He could sleep with 10 other women at the same time as you, and you have no recourse.
But now, you have emotions for him, and they're hurting because he doesn't have them for you. I would recommend cutting off the FWB with this guy for good, and remembering that FWB rarely leads to a committed relationship and almost always ends badly for one or both people.
You are worth MORE than being friends with benefits for someone. You do not NEED to give someone sex for him to love you. This guy doesn't deserve one tear you shed for him, and he's a callous asshat. Free your heart and do what CTDS recommends to do.
A
female
reader, ctds001  +, writes (19 June 2010):
Hey honey
You have been through a really hard time. Now in order to move on
1) you need to cut all contact with this guy.
2) Change your number
3) Hang out at places he DOESN'T go to
4) Then start remembering what a GREAT GIRLFRIEND you would make for a lovely guy and how nice it is to be treated like a princess.
5) Do not settle for anything but a decent relationship
6) Get out and start having fun
7) Your new moto is "I'm free and single and ready to mingle".
8) Try your hardest to banish all thoughts of this person.
Good luck, keep us updated x
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