A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm currently in the middle of an argument with my girlfriend. I think she's being completely unfair. about 6 months ago she asked me to stop talking to my ex girlfriends because it made her uncomfortable. I agreed and it wasn't an issue until recently. She is still in contact with her ex boyfriend even though he openly insults me to her and calls to talk about things that I think are not appropriate (i.e. sex). I asked her to stop talking to him and she agreed but in that time he's called her maybe 4 times and she talks to him for about 5-10 minutes when he does. She says that she feels awkward finding an excuse to get off the phone with him. So in the past few days I started talking to one of my ex's again, my logic being that if she won't consider my feelings, why should I make concessions for her. She's now mad at me and saying I'm "spiteful", but how can I get her to understand how I feel without it blowing up into a huge fight like it has been?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2009): Why shouldn't you still be on speaking terms with your exes? It's great if you can still remain friendly with exes - there's enough anger in the world already without adding to it! She's insecure, that's for sure, probably immature as well and if she can't accept you being friendly with exes there will be trouble ahead for you.
It should be pointed out to her that inappropriate conversations and insults thrown in your direction should be unacceptable to her, and she should tell this ex of hers to knock it off. That point in her conversation with him should be the perfect opportunity to put the phone down on him.
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