A
male
age
30-35,
*ostinEyes
writes:I have been talking to this girl for a while now and we have talked about dating a bit. She has reservations because she hurt one of her friends before this because she was hurt from another previous relationship. She had decided not to have any serious relationships for a couple years... until she met me. She admits that she likes me a lot and because she says I am so sweet she would hate to hurt me. I have tried to reassure her that I understand the possibilities and that I will wait until she feels ready if she wants me to. I was just wondering if anyone could give me some advice on what I could say or do to try and convince her. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, kliciouss +, writes (12 January 2009):
 i feel your pain. i was exactly like the girl you are pursuing. i am sure she likes you just as much as you like her. its really sad that her life was effected before. it really hurts and it takes time to heal.
persistence is the most important thing you can do right now. no matter how much she tells you she doesn't want to hurt you, make her feel that you will be there for her no matter what. the more you show your concerns for her problems, or just simple things like what color she likes, the more she will see how special you are.
my ex really liked me but i was reluctant to be serious with him. he kept trying and trying (not in an annoying way). he would come visit me randomly or surprise me. it was really cute. the longer he tried, even though i kept being a bitch to him, the more i saw how much he wanted me. i felt so special that i gave in and we were happily together. it took him 4 months to get me to be with him. i've dated others in those 4 months too, but in the end... i chose him because he was so persistent.
goodluck.
A
female
reader, artistical_bumblebee +, writes (12 January 2009):
 no matter how she tries, she will end up hurting people. It's life moveon. guys and girls are forever causing pain for eachother but there is no sense in dwelling on it. she needs to get over this , because by staying in the past there is no future.
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