A
female
 ,
*una~
writes:I'm thinking about taking up a job that might affect the number of times I'll be able to see my boyfriend. He lives 2 hours away from me, and we spend every weekends together since we dated 2 yrs ago. If I take on this job, I know most of my weekends will be toward work and will change the way how we spend time together. My boyfriend and I are planning to move in together in the summer. He is waiting for the application process for his new job. I'm scare to take up this job opportunity now. I'm scare he'll sit at home doing nothing while I work really hard and not having time to see him. I don't want my career to affect our relationship in a negative way. How should I balance it? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, JulietteElise  +, writes (28 February 2007):
 There are a few things i'd like to know before adviseing you, such as were each job would be loacted (distince wise), and if either one of you will have to move for it. However, if its just that the jobs are in the areas that you both live in (2 hours appart) i don't see this as being a HUGE problem... however, you said both of you were going to move in together over the summer, so where was it you were both planning on liveing? Is it at all possable to start liveing together now? Perhaps in a location of equal distince to each diffrent work place for you both. Also, you must have certian days of at a job right? and he probably will too, so if you both could try you might beable to get the same days off, even if your "weekend" is now during the week. Also, if this isnt possable, you could still both drive halfway to a resturant or movie or whatever during a day off or after work to meet, even though i know an hour is a lot. Or, perhaps he could spend his weekends with you, for even if you have to be at work, you wont be at work all day long and then when you are back you guys can have some fun. Also, he dousnt have to "sit at home doing nothing" because he could be out with friends, relaxing, or doing whatever.... maybe even start looking into places to live during the summer even if its a bit early to do househunting, it still might be usefull. I know it seems horrible to not see eachother for the weekend at least, but if it happens it will only be tempoary, and you both can still talk on the phone and such. You have both been dateing 2 years you've said, so i'm sure there is a firm foundation in your relationship and you have nothing to fear from not seeing him as often, other then of course not seeing him. But if you guys are liveing together during the summer, despite where you each work, it isnt that long off till summer, even if it seems like it might be forever. You said this job would keep you very busy though, does this mean stressfull or just that you would have to work weekends? If its stress, perhaps its not the best job, if its just working weekends i've already mentioned a few ways of working around that. But i dont think you should have to give up the job if its a really great oppertunity, after all, he could always find a new job somewhere closer too (or where he'd ahve to work weekends). This is all a change, but i'm sure it will be worked out! just talk it over with eachother :0)
|
