A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My ex boyfriend and I broke up 5 months ago due to differences in religion. I ignored him for very long after that as I was angry he gave me up because of religion. However, recently we started talking as we are colleagues and we became close friends again. His friends know we broke up and he is single now. He refers to me as his friend now. He says things like "don't worry you still have a friend like me." and he always jokingly says maybe he can consider who and who, which girl is not bad etc. Or things like maybe who and who will be his girlfriend next time. However,he buys medicine for me when I am sick. He don't like it when I jokingly say my guy friends are better. He want to know about my suitors, if there is any progress etc. Sometimes he puts his arms on my shoulders ( couple like). He says things like "Told you I am the best, how to find a guy like me". He talks about our past memories. There is a girl who likes him and is of the same religion as him. They are just friends as of now. He told me next time the three of us can go out together?! Which makes me wonder if he likes the girl or not. If he likes the girl, why would he bring his ex-gf along. If he doesn't like the girl, why would he want to go out with her in the first place. Or he just want all of us to be friends? I am confused why he calls me friend and he says he will definitely have a girlfriend in the future yet his actions towards me is a bit contradicting.
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female
reader, Anastasia  +, writes (30 September 2012):
 Hi Singapore,
This is what we call in the Western world, having your cake and eating it. It means that he doesn't want anyone else to have you, but he can have who he wants. It is very selfish and by no means is it an act of love.
What you need to do is completely separate yourself from this guy. Ignore him. I know you are friends and you probably have feelings for him, but try to go beyond that. I am sure you are a beautiful young lady, who is smart and has alot of offer someone that deserves you. So let this guy go and move on with your life. Let him play all his games by himself. You deserve better.
Ana
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