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female
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anonymous
writes: my partner and me have been together for 13yrs, we have 3 kids, we have had a rocky 13 yrs but always loved eachother, 3 months ago we split ou and he has done his own thing in that time, 3 weeks ago he started to warm to me and he decided to work things out with me, i was shocked cause he has been so cold with me, but he was eager to make a go , this friday he said he is going out with friends, and maybe he went to fast when he said he needed to do his own thing and was cold towards me again, i havent heard from him in 2 days, i feel used and hurt and i dont know what to do ? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, willywombat  +, writes (9 April 2006):
 13 years is a long time. I think that this relationship ahs died and neither of you are willing to face up to it yet. It is always difficult, but when there are children involved it is even more so.
Sit down and really think about what you get exactly from this relationship. Do you get all your needs fulfilled or is it just a bad habit or rut you ahve gotten into?
Then decide what you are going to say to him. If you want to amke another go of it you need professional help to get it back on track......thats if he will accept help and if he wants to make a go of it as well.
If you decide that you dont want to live like this, waiting for his call and everything on his terms then be strong. Make the decision to move on and not let him into your life as a partner and lover.
Get some professional help.
I wish you luck and send BIG hugs..xxxx
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