A
female
age
51-59,
*alacano
writes:Help again in finding an answer..Three weeks ago ,if u remember my original post, i found my boyfriend of 3.5 years in bed with another women, as u know he is a lot younger than me, but his betrayal devasted me.. which brings me to today...ten days ago his other gf who he was seeing on and off for the past year texts me again...she also is having a hard time dealing with his cheating, she left her husband and two small children , in hopes of marrying my boyfriend, but is currently with a restraining order out on him....does not want to see him, but also does not want me to see him either....well two days ago, my ex shows up at my work, to tell me how very sorry he made me feel, please dont leave him, he made a bad mistake, he says she was chasing him, ..his ego is huge.....all lies, but, very suncere in his approach....my question is this....why must i always have to have this man on my brain,, i have tried everything,,,and yet,,, i cant stop obsessing about, what he did to me,,, and mire the oroblem,,, what he is doing now...
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female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (13 April 2013):
 The break up is still fresh. It is natural to mourn over a break up and a betrayal. Realizing how bad he was does not necessarily speed up the healing process. You are still obsessing about him because even though mentally you know he is no good, there is a part of you that still wants to get back with him because of the attachment. You have to cut the cord by sticking with your decision to end it for good. Refuse to see him at work. Maybe you might need a restraining order too, based on what the other woman told you. His cheating has little to do with your age and looks, but his bailing out on responsibility and then lining up another person before he's lonely again.
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