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*okitasoyyo
writes: Hi, I am 37 weeks Of pregnancy and I am only 17 years old and my "boyfriend" is 21. I've been having a problem lately which I don't know how to solve. I was working before I got pregnant but he told me that he didn't want me to work during my pregnancy, so I decided to quit my job and stay home resting. Well, once I left my job I became dependant on his money because my parents weren't going to give me money. All my "boyfriend" gives me is 20 dollars a week and he expects that to last me the whole week. He really thinks that 20 dollars is enough, so recently I began to complain about the amount of money he gives me and he got upset. I told him that I need clothes because none of my clothes are fitting me and he got upset. I don't know what to do with him, he's very greedy with his money and I don't know how to confront him and let him know that I need more money. Another thing I was telling him that once I give birth I would look for a job but that he still has to give me money for the baby and me and he also got upset and asked me why does he have to give me money when I am gonna be working. What should I do? Can someone give me some type of advice that I can follow??? thank you
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2006): I agree with the first answer. If I were you I would go ahead and file a claim with the child support office in your town. It is totally free. The state will decide how much income your boyfriend will have to pay you monthly. You are not married so your boyfriend will have to help out finacially wheather or not you get help from the child support office so it would be much better for you if there was an order from the court saying that he does have to pay you. If you do not do this now he could decide that he doesn't want to pay you and would not have to unless there is an order. Like I said, I'm sure he is a reasonable guy so he, I'm sure, already knows he will pay you support, so by going through the child support court will not hurt your relationship. The order will only ensure that he pays a certain, fair amount every month to help with the child.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2005): Take Your "Boyfriend" to "Child Support Court". It's much better in the long run. The two of you can hold whatever type of relationship you choose without having money interfere because the state will take care of that for you. You should not view it as mean or punishing of him, but as liberating. You WILL REQUIRE financial assistance to raise a child, even if you work two jobs. Raising a healthy child will always require the finances of both parents, regardless of any other factor. So, call up your local Departmet of Social Services and file a claim. Not only will you get the financial support from the father, but you are probably also in need of government assisted healthcare and a food program for your new baby. You don't need to involve him in this decision process either. Just inform him of your plan, and be sure to follow through. It's not a threat or a punishment, it's the only reality for you and your child. Don't let your insecurities in this "relationhip" affect the care you give to your innocent baby. Call DSS.
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