A
female
age
36-40,
*ellybeans
writes:a friend told me his good friend liked me so I started seeing this guy. This guy emailed me, gave me him number, and invited me to coffee.I think I scared him during out first two dates because I was not sure about my feelings toward him. Recently I discovered that I liked him so I have been calling him and asked him to take me out.He is a nice guy, always pays for our dates although I offer to pay for myself. He is a very honest guy, does not always compliment me but lovely to hang out with.However, he never calls me or talk to me online.Yesterday, we were to a movie on our 4th date. He behaved really well. When I gently grabbed his arm, he did not react to it so I let go after one minute.Basically, he says he likes me, but I do not see any affection. The worst part is I already fell for him so I care.He just turned 30, not a little boy anymore and he has had relationships before. His friend told me he was very shy and I told him I lived a simple life, basically I never party, or smoke, and I don't drink.What do you think? I will be more patient and keep going out with him if he is shy; however, if he doesn't like me I will withdraw my feelings and try focusing on something else.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2009): I'm a very shy guy when it comes to girls. I can see why youre getting frustrated. How can he have no reaction when you grab his arm....at the movies.The problem with us shy guy's is that there can be many different reason's as to why we are being shy. If he's 30, I get the feeling, that he has been hurt before, (since you said he had previous relationships).Only one way to go from here....you have to ask him the question's you are asking here. Simple as that. If that doesn't help and you really have no other clue as to why he is not showing affection. I would probably move on. At least give him the chance, by being direct with him. You have to get him to talk. As I said, I'm very shy when it comes to girls. But if a girl I liked grabbed my arm in a movie theater, I wouldn't hesitate to show affection. Damn...where are you girls...shy guy here willing to show affection :)Good Luck!! Mr. Anonymous.
A
female
reader, la petite belle +, writes (14 November 2009):
 omg!... this is soo craZy!... Im going throught EXACTLY the same thing with a similar guy... although mine is younger but UGH! I'm so fed up with his behaviour!, he is the sweetest guy when we are on dates, but I basically am the one that arranges meetings and dates!!!! he never texts me, he responds but this whole thing is wearing me down and today when we have our date (in a few hours) Im going to ask him to let me know whether I need to move on becuase im not gonna sit around and wait for him!
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