A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend cheated on me last week in a club by kissing another girl as my friends saw and told me. He, however, claims he was 'too drunk to remember' and therefore he says it means nothing. I love him and don't want to loose him, this was completely out of character and he has never done anything to hurt me before and has always been such a loving and caring boyfriend. He swore he would never do it again and promised he wouldnt get as drunk in the future. I have decided to give him another chance but all i can think about is that night and how he was unfaithful and i know that i cannot trust him anymore. shall i stay with him and hope it never happens again or finish it? xxxx
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cheated on me, drunk, kissing Reply to this Question
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male
reader, lifecycle +, writes (7 March 2008):
Its not easy, once that trust is gone its really hard to get it back from my experience. If you feel you are the type of person who can *truly* let it go and forget about it, then give him another chance. But if you think this might come up in conversations, arguements, etc then it might just be better to walk away as things will only get worse over time.
Questions I think you need to ask yourself are;
What happens next time he wants to go out drinking?
How are you going to be when he's out? Will you trust him to be faithful?
Take care, I hope things work themselves out x
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2008): Oh hunny i feel so sorry for you, i know exactly how you feel my bf did the same to me but actually slept with the girl behind my back.
I didn't take him back, i couldn't after he'd been with some1 else. He's still trying his hardest to win me back . . . . f*****g fool. lol.
You say that you couldn't trust him again, well we all know that a relationship is nothing without trust. Personally i say once a cheat always a cheat, only you can decide to take him back but it'll never be the same, it'll always be in the back of your mind.
Just give it some thought as to what you want, it was a kiss it could of been worse. But please if you do decide to take him back give him one big kick up the arse and show him who's boss from now on!
Hope i helped chick
Kay x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2008): Honey, it'll be hard for a while until it seems like the kiss was ages ago, but you've done the right thing by taking him back. He seems very sorry, so you'll just have to believe him as best as you can. I would say stay with him and hope it never happens again - but if it does, make sure he's out that door. No girl deserves a cheating man, but this was a drunken kiss, so I guess it can be made up for.. But make sure he pays for it! If you refuse sex or act a bit funny, make him pay in this way and don't cave in. For a little while (maybe a week or so) you could act just not quite the same, so its not all just blow over quick as he likes. He needs to pay! But subtly. So yes, make sure he knows how distraught you are, and then get over and and carry on happily together. Good luck :]
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2008): since he has told you it will never happen again give him that benefit of doubt and if he truly loves you it will never happen again
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A
female
reader, xXBeccaTxX +, writes (7 March 2008):
 No! don't just throw him out the door!...He made a mistake,and i'm sure you will sometime too. You just have to accept that he didn't mean to do it. If he was cheating on you or anything,he would have left you when you talked about it. He obviously cares for you a lot and would NEVER do it again. To make yourself feel better keep thinking that he feels really guilty now that he'll loose you. Give the poor soul another chance. But if he does anything like that again then you may choose to change your mind... Hope i helped... FEEL FREE TO SEND ME A MESSAGE IF YOU WANT TO!!!
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A
female
reader, LIERIN  +, writes (7 March 2008):
 Well ...
This is really only up to you darling... if you want to close your eyes and let it go .. or if you want to show him that it hurts you and you are not going to let this happen again - give him a break ... to show him, you are upset w him and you are NOT ok with what happened between him and that girl.
I personaly would leave my BF .. he knows .. and he feels the same way about me!
I don't care if you are drunk or not cause at some point - that's what you wanted to do!
Once you let it happen ... it will happen over and over again.
Good luck to you !
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