A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my fiance for 4 yrs. we moved in together 18 mos ago. he no longer makes me feel desirable, which is damperin my self esteem. he used to make me feel so beautiful. we are intimate ocassionally but nowhere close to how much we used to be. he is always makin comments sayin i am cheatin on him an constantly checkin my cell phone. i havent given him reason to suspect that anythin is goin on. this really irritates me and does not help the intimacy problem. i fear that i will go elsewhere to find the kind of attention i need and get the feelings i used to get from my fiance. i know that wud be wrong, but i am tired of the constant sarcastic remarks and accusations. i have talked to him about this about a month ago, things were ok for 2 wks and then just went right back. hellppp...!
View related questions:
fiance, moved in, self esteem Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Red Green 0289 +, writes (17 July 2009):
GET OUT - and do so now... don't waste the money on a detective... it sounds like he got serious control issues, and you need to get away from men like this.
Look at him clearly, and in the future try to recognize these patterns BEFORE you get into a relationship. Odds are good that your attracted to guys that may have this pattern - we all seem to be attracted to people that down deep fill a need, or strike a cord with us. You may have a tendecy to pick men who are possive, and this one sould have gone over the acceptable line.
Now, I also agree he may be cheating on you, but I don't care - get out now!
A
male
reader, Jason32477 +, writes (17 July 2009):
 Your not married yet.Maybe its time to get out while you still can.If you have been together 4 years and have been giving him 0 reason to think your being unfaithful and still get reamed for it there is a problem.You have already talked to him about it,and that has not helped.I hate to say it but maybe its time to move on to greener pastures.Cause if he seriously thinks your cheating why is he still with you? Try asking him that.Odds are you will be better off with out his accusations all the time.I can understand him checking your phone and such.I like to be nosy my self.But if has no prof of anything and keeps accusing you then its just time to move on.
...............................
A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (17 July 2009):
 Going elsewhere would be wrong. If you feel the need to, first end your relationship with your boyfriend, and find someone who will treat you right all the time.
Jealousy can be a killer of relationships. This type of issue comes from not feeling as if he's adequate for you, or possibly being cheated on in the past. But, he shouldn't allow his insecurities destroy your relationship.
I'd recommend relationship counseling. He needs to understand that by protecting himself from getting hurt, he's destroying what he's trying to protect. Behaviors like this are as if he were to be balancing on the edge, just waiting for the bomb to strike and destroy.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2009): Sweetie he is probably cheating on you. I would get a detective. Make him look bad first before you make yourself look bad by doing what he claims you are doing to begin with.
...............................
|
