A
female
age
30-35,
*yshorrty89
writes:HOKAY.. so im nineteen years of age and im dating this guy who is twenty five. So he just broke up with his ex five months ago and they were together like seven years, and have a kid together. He has pictures of her everywhere!! like his facebook myspace computer everywhere. Anyways im not comfortable with it. I realize they were together a long time and have a kid but its just lame:( I just feel like he might not be over her or i dont even know. Whats ur opinion?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2009): I would brake up with him. He has too much baggage for you!!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2009): he is not over her. too much history with her and the kid binds them together forever. if you see this relationship going nowhere then end it before you are any deeper than you already are. just be honest with yourself and him - try not to force things and know when to quit. will save you years of misery. he only broke up with her 5 months ago. how long have you 2 been dating. he will not erase her from his life. basically there will always be 3 people in your relationship.
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A
female
reader, misztoria +, writes (15 August 2009):
 Lol I'm 19 and my boyfriend's 25 and he use to have pictures of his ex and stuff like that and he use to talk about his daugther with her all the time. Depending how long you've been in a relationship with him, give it more time. It took my boyfriend about 8 months to really get over her when we were together. A year later I had his first son and he really backed off and can't stand her now, but besides having his son he really started to forget about her after our first year together. He's probably always going to love her, but if he's IN love with you that won't matter. Make sure, and I mean MAKE SURE he is over her and isn't going back and forth between you two, if he's completely done with her there's no reason to be suspcious, like I said, give it time. Good luck hun!
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A
female
reader, purple_butterfly  +, writes (15 August 2009):
I can completely understand your situation. try to put urself in his shoes for the moment. I am not saying that his ex and his son are very important to him , even more than you. Youre more important and thts the reason youre his present.
Now, at this moment, he sure needs a lot of love, comfort and trust to get over his ex and instead of questioning his actions, just keep loving him. I am sure you love him a lot and pictures of his ex would really cause discomfort and insecurity. I know its not demanding to ask ur bf to just not have his exes pics all over but its all about how much ur concerned abt it.
I would say, just take some more time. spend more time lovin and comforting him than getting worried abt his past. Youre the only one who can get him to get over his ex, if he hsnt already. as your emotional attached keeps gettin stronger, slowly mention this problem to him sometime in bed after a nice makeout session :)
With guys, it takes a lil patience but once we know how to manage our relationship with them, everything runs smooth.
Like it was said in the big fat greek wedding " a man is the head but the women is the neck and the head will turn where the neck wants it to " . Love him a lot and be his neck
I shall prayfor the best of both of you
take care
love
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A
male
reader, GrimmReality +, writes (15 August 2009):
 They have a child together. She is the mother of his child. She will always be in his life. That is an inescapable fact. That also being the case, it seems like he really has not moved on by what you've stated in your post. Your suspicion that he is not over her is well warranted.
I'd simply be honest with him and tell him that although you understand their history together, that what is past is past. And if you two are to go anywhere in this relationship, that you'd simply like to know where you stand. He can hem and haw but the onus will be on him to answer.
He can answer two ways.
"she's the mother of my child".
or
"she means nothing to me".
If he answers the first way, you will have to decide whether or not you can deal with being compared in every way with her. And also knowing that he is not over her at all. That also means that the relationship is most likely stuck in its current gear forever.
If he answers the latter, he will be removing those photos at once.
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A
male
reader, pepito92 +, writes (15 August 2009):
Well, if i were to have my take on it. i would talk to him about it. Ask him to be truthful to you about what he is feeling. I think it would be that he still has feelings for his Ex, and that isn't fair to you. A break in relationship of 7 yrs doesn't heal up in 5 months. Hope this helped.
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