A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid, I am a married woman who is very confused. I am very attracted to a man that used to be friends with my husband. They were college roommates and actually got into a physical fight over me years ago. However, the guy(we'll call him john), has finally confessed his feelings after 5 years yet, he's never made a move. Our relationship has always been platonic, but now I'm having second thoughts on whether I've made the right choice. I have a very emotionally charged bond and attraction with john, and not a very stable, predictable life with my husband.Any advice you offer would be appreciated....
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male
reader, eddie  +, writes (10 December 2007):
 So what will you do if you decide to be with John and you meet the next attractive guy....leave John? And the next one, and the next one.....Relationships are not all about attraction, it's about what you build over time. If you jumped ship every time you had an attraction things would be pretty shallow.
Obviously you've been encouraging this man's behavior. How did you end up in a position where he'd have the courage, need to be this honest with you. Did he just approach you and declare his undying attraction. (not love, it's attraction or lust) What have you don't to improve your marriage? Why are you cheating on your husband. By being in a position where you're encouraging this man, knowing his feelings, you are creating a bad situation. That is an emotional indiscretion.
By the way, yo' relationship has never been platonic. He's always had feelings for you, making his treatment of you calculated, and you've always enjoyed the fact they fought over you. Platonic friends are not attracted to each other to the extent they consider leaving their spouses. Work on your marriage and tell your husband about the other guy.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2007): Well first off, its been five years and this guy still has a crush on you and you believe him?? I mean he obviously had some sort of beef with your husband so I am sure it would make his year to throw that in the husband's face. I don't know how much of that actually has to do with YOU. But I hope more than I think.
And another thing, it's ok for a woman's boyfriend/husband to get in a fight for her if NECESSARY, but some guy who merely has a crush on you?? If that were true, don't you find that kind of CREEPY?? Anyways, I GUARANTEE you they have some beef that has nothing to do with you and he is probably just using you to get back at your husband. If you do go along with it, I think you are making a big mistake because I don't think this guy is being completely honest with you and if your husband finds out, that's it.
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