A
female
age
41-50,
*olita
writes:Dear Friends,I am really interested in hearing your opinion in relation to this; I have been with my ex boyfriend for almost 3 years. He always looked serious and he wanted me to dress concentionally ( classic outfits) and he was always critical when i tried to wear sexy outfits. So gradually i compromised and i ditched my tight trousers and revealing tops. We broke up as i discovered ( when we moved in together) that he had a special interest on online sites like adultfriendfinder and similar stuff. I had also discovered his online adultfriend finder profile( He had been a member even before meeting him). This is shocking! That guy was never adventurous when having sex with me, so i tried not to be too demanding. I used to give him oral sex but he never did so! On his profile when asked what turns him on he states ( giving oral sex, threesomes etc..) I am really shocked and i am just wondering what his problem was with me and he was behaving differenltly.Have i been with a quy with a double or distorted personality? a pevert disguised in a serious ( and seemingly quity moral guy??). I regret spending almost three years with him..and ofcourse i would have never been with him, had known his online interests. Thanks..L.
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female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (22 March 2009):
It could be that he wants to be with a respectable girlfriend that he can make love to in a conservative missionary position....
But that sexually he wants a disposable "slutty" girl that he can do what he wants to.
Some guys cannot accept that we women can be ladies in the street and something else entirely in the bedroom. So they go to different women for their different desires.
Yes you found out after 3 years, but you could have spent a lot longer with him. I am sure you have learned from that time and had some happy memories.
Never think of it as time wasted, just as a slow period in one part of your life.
You are free of him now and will know never to be with a man who tells you what to wear again.
Good Luck!! xx
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