A
female
age
30-35,
*liz
writes:My boyfriend has been on vacation for the past week and is getting back tomorrow night. For the past few days, we've been talking about sex and how we can't wait until he gets back, etc. First off, I am all about trying new things. He's recently been opening up to me about sex and what he likes and stuff, which i love, as he already knows what I like. Last night, he asked if I wanted to try something new, so I said sure, what is it? And he said we should try 69. I said yeah, definitely. He is basically my first boyfriend, and first for almost everything, including sex. I have gone down on him, but he has never done it for me. At first, he told me he would, but he doesn't like doing it, which kinda turned me off of the idea. But now, he's been totally into the idea of it, saying he really wants to, that he is more comfortable with the idea now and he wants to please me.With my first "boyfriend", I was pressured into having him go down on me, and I ended up not liking the experience. I always had joked with my boyfriend, saying I'm excited for when he decides he's ready to try it, but now that he is, I'm getting scared. I mean, I've only had it done once before, but that was a few years ago and now every time I imagine my boyfriend doing it, I just see my old "boyfriend" and it creeps/freaks me out. I do not want to tell my boyfriend that part because I know it'll just turn awkward. Even having his head lower down near that area while looking at me freaks me out and I push him away. I even almost started crying once. I have no idea what is wrong with me!How can I get over this freaked out feeling? I don't want to start doing what he wants to try and after a couple of seconds have to stop because of my feelings. I just want to be able to enjoy this "new" experience and have fun. I have no problem going down on him and I enjoy sex, it's just being on the receiving end that freaks me out. Please help me figure this out, I'd really appreciate it. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, fishdish +, writes (14 August 2010):
 If you want to go through with it, tell him to start slow. Maybe have him finger you a little first, maybe kissing your belly or insides of your thighs, something that's not direct contact but something that's going to make you feel eased into the act and wanting more. if it's the him watching you factor that is the trigger for your discomfort, you can probably tell him that that is a turn off to you and he'll probably be happy to just focus on your lady parts (taking little peeks at you just means he likes turning you on and wants to see you getting all hot and bothered, not a bad thing!).
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